The Mess I Got Into ( This Is How I Met You ) Jikook

My Heart Belongs To You

Letting go of someone who owns your heart is hard.
Sometimes holding on to that person is even harder.
I know I'm not the easiest person to love, but you are.
It's not that I can't live without you; it's that I don't want to. There's a difference. We all make choices in life and I choose you.

My heart belongs to you

Jungkook POV

Flash back

I wonder at times, if I ever tell my feelings to Jimin and Taehyung does too? Whom he'll choose? A person who has always shown him hate or a person who he has grown up with and shown nothing but love and care. Ever since I met Taehyung, I knew that he was in love with Jimin, and that Jimin would sooner or later feel the same way. It would be stupid to hold on to the hopes. So I try not to give names to what I feel for him, because I already know it's too much, and I want peace from the shit that love brings in its wake. I want to be alone, unburdened, and free. I like knowing the possibilities there, for us, maybe…  Except, it'll go wrong, of course, because it always goes wrong. And when it goes wrong, I'll lose him for good, and this thing we've built together with love and hate, which is literally the only good part of my life will be forever fucked, because I won't find anyone like him and everything afterward will be tainted by the memories. If only he could come inside my head and see what was there, he'd understand that he occupied a unique place in my thoughts and in my affections. I felt I owed him that information, but was afraid that saying it might move this conversation into territory from which it would be difficult to retreat.

Present day-

Today there is a boring party at some grand hotel. Where all idols, trainees, trainers and some bigshots of Bighit are invited. Honestly I have zero interest in going to this party but Taehyung wanted me to tag along with him, so who am I to deny it? The party was around 8 in the evening and being Saturday we thought of leaving a bit early as there can be a possibility of traffic on our way. We agreed Taehyung would pick me and Jimin up at 7.

In the morning I followed my regular routine, I went for a jog, we have a common gym in our house. I woke Jimin up and we did some gym and exercise together. I quickly had an shower and made breakfast for us till he took a shower. Once he was done he walked in "it smells so good, what's in there?" He sounded like a kid. The smell of pancakes still hung in the air. "I made pancakes for us" I smiled, he folded his sleeves and walked towards the dining table, taking his seat. He looked absolutely adorable. He was wearing an oversized hoodie to be specific, my hoodie. After a few months of being together, we eventually opened up with each other and ever since then Jimin has been using my clothes almost regularly. Also I have never stopped him as it always gives me a "boyfriends" vibe, even if we are not there is no harm for living those moments. After eating we did some cleaning. Later in noon we saw some random movies just to pass the time. Halfway through the movie Jimin dozed off on my shoulder. Instead of continuing the movie, I lightly picked him up and took him to his bedroom. Along with him I slept too, cuddling him tight. After some time I woke up, Jimin was still sleeping soundly so let him sleep for some more time. As taehyung was gonna come in a few hours i wanted to be ready before he got in.

The doorbell rings. I know it'll be Taehyung looking at the time. This guy is always here way before the given time to make sure we get ready on time. After a good 10mins I heard Jimin calling me out "Jungkook, Taehyung is here". "Coming" I almost said as a whisper, there was no point in screaming or shouting as i was walking out anyways. When I walked out I saw Jimin hugging Taehyung. A burning sting of jealousy rose in my chest. My entire mood changed from cheerful to God knows what? It didn't go unnoticed that Jimin was still not ready. What was going on?  Why isn't he ready yet? What was Jimin and Taehyung talking about? Why am I left out in this conversation? Is Jimin not coming? I was so occupied with questions and thoughts. I blankly stared at them for a long time. I saw Jimin struggle to get out of Taehyung's hold, but was badly failing. "Why don't you and Jungkook talk, I'll quickly go to the bathroom and come", said Jimin. Yet trying to get out of Taehyung's grip but this time getting successful as taehyung let him go. I was still not out of jealousy and thoughts when Taehyung kissed Jimin on his nose. If it wasn't in terms of letting Taehyung have Jimin as they deserve to be together or Jimin deserves someone like Taehyung not me, I'm sure I would have beaten Taehyung by now. Forgetting the fact that I once loved him or I'm his best friend now. And that mother fucker has an audacity to say "Come back soon" in the most flirtatious tone. Someone is gonna get killed for sure today. Jimin quickly ran to the washroom.

It took all my power to get my anger and jealousy in control. This wasn't the first time he kissed Jimin, Taehyung has always shown Jimin all his affection, love and care. It wasn't something new but yet it always hurts to see them this close. I took a few deep breaths and walked towards Taehyung. I still was confused why Jimin wasn't ready? "Hey, you're looking absolutely gorgeous as always", I said before going to the point. "Hi, coming from the sexiest man means a lot," we both laughed. Taehyung has always been a sucker for compliments so i know even a simplest compliment would make his day. "Why isn't Jimin ready?" I asked, as he looked dumbfounded at me. "Didn't he tell you, he is not coming? He wants to spend some time alone." I felt hurt and disappointed. I have shared the entire day with Jimin, but not a single time he mentioned he was not coming to the party. Am I really not important to Jimin, not even as his roommate? I understand I have not given him much hate, but I tried, I really did to be good to him. I have not just given him my hate but love, care, affection too. Yes, I know at times I get overly emotional and those emotions take charge of me and I hurt him, I get that but I also try to make up with him every time I mess up.

There are these unsaid words and feelings, though we both know about it but no one wants to acknowledge it. I snapped out of my thoughts when I heard him walk in "Aren't you guys going? it's getting late" he asked looking at the clock. "Why? What's so in a hurry ? Do you have some other plans? have called in someone else after we're gone?" Taehyung said, and with those words I lost my sanity.  "Well what if I have? Can't I have some fun? Does that really matter?" He said with a smirk. I got all steamed up, in fact we both did. Just seeing Jimin with Taehyung burns me up, imagining some other man with Jimin, I might kill that person. It took all my energy to not lose my composure. "I'm kidding guys, there is no one coming. Who would I even call? I have no one except you both and our few common friends. Go enjoy, get laid, have fun and stop thinking nonsense", He said with a smile. It still gave me an uneasy feeling, as if someone was going to take him away from me, he was never mine but yet I wanted him for a little bit longer for myself, with whatever relationship it be. "Okay, we'll go. Call me if you need anything" Taehyung said in a worried tone, i couldn't utter a single word. "Yes, I will. Go have fun". With that said we both left but living our hearts with him, he'll make it or to break it, it's his call. What worse he can do than I did?.

Hey fam,

Here's a surprise update. I hope y'all like it.

Stay healthy, stay strong.

Refer to chapter
~ I'm Falling For You 2~