The Shine

Blackout - part 1

I felt like I should say "sorry I haven't posted in a while". I'm not sorry. I don't know why people say sorry for everything. A couple of concerned readers did post in the comments asking if I was okay. I did not die in a car accident. I will someday probably. Not yet.

I worked a woman called Bloody Mary. That would be a better name if she had a supernatural gimmick. She doesn't. She's just normal. Not normal normal, she's six two and built like a linebacker, but wrestling normal. She's the first woman I've worked who was bigger and stronger than me.

She doesn't have a have a gimmick that goes with the name Bloody Mary. She does have the word "Devour" tattooed on her stomach. Maybe she has Heinz as a corporate sponsor. Remember those Devour commercials where the guys wanted to fuck the food?

That had to be some pitch meeting. "Alright, here's the campaign, the food is so good men want to stick their dick in it!" The other men in the meeting thought that was a good idea. So much that it actually happened. I need to get into advertising, that's a world where nothing you do matters.

I've explained that the only reason I get booked as much as I do is because sometimes I summon my fetch and let my opponent do some gnarly shit to it. There's only so much the human body can take. That's why gimmick and angles came about in the first place. Why risk breaking your neck when you can cash in on homophobia instead? My fetch isn't human. It's the world's most realistic crash test dummy. You can go hog wild on that thing and it's fine. The people love it. Because they're monsters.

Even though there was no reason for it and no backstory Bloody Mary and I were going to have a no disqualification match. The kind that usually caps off a big feud. The kind of violent bloody brawl that women don't usually do. Gigging isn't something women do often either, it's one of the few advantages we have. When we do gig it's something. People always pop for a woman getting busted open. It's fucked up when you think about it.

The finish was going to be Mary bashing me on the head with a chair half a dozen times. Everyone's known since 1867 that getting hit in the head scrambles your brains but it wasn't until few years ago real sports decided to care about it. I don't know why. If you do know, reach out to me because there are other well-known problems I would like society to start caring about as well. A few years after real sports decided concussions were bad, wrestling decided to go along with that as well. Sort of.

Because of this half-hearted concern over brain safety in wrestling you don't see chair shots to the head as much anymore. You never see them on TV. That's what makes it such a cool finish. As a cover for my fest summoning I told Mary that before the finish I was going to roll under the ring and do a bump of coke, which is a time-honored wrestling tradition before doing something insane.

Casting a spell from starts to finish takes too long for that to work during a match. What I do is that I complete most of the spell before I go out to the ring and then stop right before it comes together. I store the energy and finish it when I'm under the ring. It's feels like when you need to piss but you hold it, except someone is standing on your bladder. You can keep it together for a while, long enough for a match.

Royale Fantastique called that a spell matrix. He said that if you get really good at forming a spell matrix you can keep a couple of spells in there at the same time. He could hold spells for days at a time, weeks if he wanted to. That level of skill seems impossible to me at this point.

I went under the ring, I had the spell simmering, then it just went out of my mind. It's like when you have a list of things to buy in your head and forget it right when you walk into the store. There's no getting it back. It's gone. I knew what had happened, someone has disrupted my matrix. Royale would do that if I was fucking up a spell. He could reach in and knock my energy apart so I wouldn't miscast. A miscast spell is very dangerous.