y/n's pov.
i stumbled around the compound with my headphone in,being the youngest avenger there's not really much to do i mean everyone is so serious with their training makes it impossible to actually enjoy anything i know i'm 17 and i should just get on with it but it can get really lonely.
I walk to one of the indoor swimming pools and take out my headphones and get sit on the edge just dangling my feet into the water most of the avengers have been sent on a mission except from me,sam and natasha.Apparently it's because we need to have a "rest day" as Steve said which i'm not complaining about,Sam is off on a date and Natasha is no where to be seen she often stays to herself around me which i find really odd especially when the others see a different side to her it's like she keeps a wall up with me.I don't let it bother me but i think we would get on.
Whilst sitting on the side of the pool i think it's a good time to train one of my secret powers that no one knows about as i don't feel confident with this one yet and have no control of it,i can basically breathe under water but sometimes i loose the connection and blackout from being overpowered.
I stand up and dive into the deep end of the pool my clothes are still on me,i make my way to the bottom of the pool and sit down and relaxe every muscle and take a deep breath under the water,it takes a lot of power to do but i'm doing it i open my eyes under the water and see the colour gold flow around me as my powers charge the water,i get shocked every-time i do it,i think it's my favourite thing about myself it's where i can just focus on something other than the dark thoughts that consume my head most days.
30 minutes go past and i start feeling weak but im not going up to the surface just yet i want to challenge myself today,another 10 minutes go past and my visions is going blurry next thing i know my breathing is suffering and i realise what's going on i try to swim up but i'm too weak to move,all i can do is swallow the water and scream under water hoping someone is near,my heart i pounding louder than ever and i give up fighting for air my eyes get surrounded with black dots and all i can make out is a figure standing on the edge getting undressed and screaming my name but it all goes black.
*time skip*
I throw up water as i feel someone doing cpr on my frail body and all of my senses slowly come back, "come on,come on y/n fight ! i said fight this !" i hear a worried scream,my chest is getting pressed down and released in a fast motion,i cough more water up and feel my whole body getting moved so i'm on my side and more water flows out of my mouth as i choke on some of it i slowly open my eyes and i can see natasha red hair dangling infront of my eyes as she is rubbing my back behind me,i try and sit up but i only get pushed back down gently and scared voice speaking i couldn't really focus and i think natasha could sense that because she spoke clearer "don't sit up sweetheart you need to let the blood flow around all your body first" i nod my head in response and lie down "here put your head on my lap" she speaks again but this time gently and i feel her hands direct my head onto her thighs using them as a pillow.
My body starts shaking at the coldness and how weak i am feeling ,i feel her hands rub up and down my arms in an attempt to warm me up,i tense up at this and feel awkward of my movement now i'm getting more conscious i mean can you blame me she never makes any effort to speak to me and she just saved my life. She definitely felt my body language changing and stopped doing the motion "im sorry i didn't mean to make you uncomfortable" she speaks quickly and guilt comes over me as i know she was just trying to help me out, i find my strength and croak out some words "n-no you didn't" i gasp for breath after those few words, i continue to shake and next thing i knew she was standing up,i couldn't tell what she was doing,maybe leaving me after i got all awkward i quietly sighed thinking i pushed her away but then i feel her hands wrapping around my body and slowly sitting me up, "y/n i'm just going to take off your top and give you my hoodie to wear,is that okay?" she asks in a caring tone,i nod my head and close my eyes,i feel her grabbing my top and slowly ripping it off of me.I try and cover my body with my hands but she walks around me so she is looking at me and starts speaking "you're beautiful there's no need to hide from me y/n" she gently smiles and put her hoodie onto my cold body,i go to stand up but i only fall back down onto the hard ground natasha rushed to my side and catches my head before it smacks onto the concrete she lets out a relief sigh, "it's okay love just lean on me" she states picking me up,i do what she says and try and lean on her whilst taking a step but it's just too much my powers really drained me, "n-nat i can't" i whimper and my eyes start watering "shh it's okay i'm going to take you to my room okay ?" she speaks clearly and i smile in return.
She picks up my limp body and carries me all the way up to her room,she lays me down onto her bed and sits up against the head board supporting my body against hers,i feel my eyes slowly closing and sleep take over me.
I wake up to the sound of natasha humming a lullaby i stir awake and natasha moves her hand off of me and moves her whole body away from me,i mumble sleepily "no come back" and i could feel her smiling and she goes back to spooning me,i feel safe in her arms i can't really explain it,i turn over and see her looking into my eyes "hello sleepyhead" she smirks and i do a light laugh "hey stranger" i croak back into return,she cups my face and traces her thumb across my cheek i feel myself blushing and i quickly cover my face in the white covers, i hear her laugh,jesus her laugh is like heaven to my ears i've never heard it since now but i think im already addicted to it "y/n come out from the covers i want to speak to you" she says more seriously and i sit up fast as i become anxious of what she might say.
She looks at me in sympathy, "y/n you've got to be honest with me,why were you in that pool" she speaks not breaking eye contact,my heart skips a beat and i think of a reason "i was just going for a swim and i hit my head and i don't remember anything else" i speak looking down at the ground. She clenches her jaw "y/n" she says sternly and i now become scared of this side of her,i back away from her and get out of the bed getting all of my stuff together "it doesn't matter romanoff leave it" i say in a blank tone not showing emotion i go to exit her room,suddenly i feel her grab my waist and push me into the wall i gasp for air as my body's been crushed "y/n i just saved your life,and you're going to blank me off don't think you can talk to me like that only because i've been nice to you" she says not letting go of my waist. "o-okay okay i'm sorry" i whimper "just please let me go" i whisper this time,i feel her let go of the grasp of me and step back.
"what's wrong y/n?" she says grabbing my chin and pulling it up so i have to look at her "it's one of my powers nat ... i'm trying to gain control of them but sometimes i fail and black out in the water" i choke out feeling like a failure for not being able to control them.
"do you know how stupid you are y/n,you could of died what would of happened to you if i didn't hear your screams !" she shouts,i flinch at her voice and step back "like you would care if i died you do anything in your power to avoid me" i scoff. "pft you think i care that much about a 17 year old girl that i would avoid them ? well i don't okay ! we just don't have any common interests" she almost says laughing "that's because you never tried speaking to me ! you make me feel worthless and like i don't belong !" i spit out in a angry tone.
she tried to step closer to me but i step back again "y/n i'm sorry i-i just don't want to see you getting hurt you don't deserve it" i look back in confusion what is she talking about, "everyone who i let in gets hurt because of my reputation with bad people and i don't want to hurt you" she speaks opening her bedroom door,her head hangs low as she steps aside,i don't leave the room i just hug her instead i mean you've got to feel bad for the assassin she loses everyone she loves.
"just let me in,i promise you can't hurt me" i speak finally understanding her.
