My Lovely Lady

Chapter Forty-Four

Back at the Bridgerton Household, Anthony found himself in his study stressing. The words Loren had spoken to him resonated throughout his mind. 'There is no now.' 

"How could I be so stupid?!" He exclaimed, slamming a large stack of papers to the floor, not caring about the mess he was making. Anthony felt like an absolute idiot. He was too prideful, he could've waited for Loren. But he didn't. And his reasoning was absolutely idiotic. 

He was afraid that Loren had found someone better in France, and that was the reasoning for her lack of responses to his letters. And even after the realization as to why she didn't respond, he was too stubborn. He believed that he would find someone else. 

But not even the fascinating Kate Sharma could steal his attention from Loren Smith. Kate was a fiery woman who knew exactly what she wanted, and took absolutely no nonsense. In a way, she reminded Anthony of Loren. Their personalities were similar. Maybe that is why the eldest Sharma had drawn him in at first. 

Anthony glanced down at the floor, his eyes scanning the fallen parchment until his eyes landed on a specific envelope. It was addressed to Alexandre's home, for that is where Anthony knew the woman would be during her time away. He reached for it, taking the delicate paper in his hands. 

His heart ached as he pried open the delicate envelope, knowing exactly what was inside. It was his final letter to Loren. Many tears had been spilled during the writing of the letter, and he knew many more would come as he began to read. 

My love,

Not a day has gone by where I have not thought of you.

Despite not receiving a single letter from you, I still cannot allow the thoughts of you to escape. 

Loren, I am losing my mind. I cannot bear to live without you. I want nothing more than to marry you and start a family, but I am afraid that I am beginning to lose hope. You have been gone for months now, and yet I have no heard a single word from you. 

I am beginning to think you've forgotten about me. 

All I ask is that you respond. 

I miss you.

I miss you more than I could ever put into words. 

The entire family misses you. Eloise is yearning for your advice for the upcoming season, Benedict is quite lonely without you. Hyacinth and Gregory have been bickering constantly, you would always help them. It seems as though the family is falling apart without you.

We need you.

I need you.

Please, come home.

That is all I ask of you.

All my love, 

Anthony

His cheeks were wet with tears as he flopped into the large desk chair, his head falling into his hands as sobs wracked his body. How could he have done this? He finally found the love of his life, but his prideful and stubborn nature ruined his chances with her. 

Now she was whisked away from him. She had found someone better than him in every way. And now he would never be with her. Never be able to hold her, kiss her, love her. All because he couldn't allow himself to open up to her love.

He had fucked up.

And there was now no chance of ever being with his lovely lady.

-*-*-*-

guys, there is probably only two more chapters left.

and i need your help.

i love angst and sadness, so...

charles and loren endgame?

or

anthony and loren endgame?

i don't want to take the easy way out but i am slowly losing inspiration for this story, so i would like to end it soon. 

but please tell me who you want to see together. 

thank you so much for reading.

-Av-