Confident || Changbin

Warming Up

The following morning, Lily greets me again.

"Good morning, Sage! Welcome to day two of Maniac!"

She doesn't ask for my ID this time as she checks me in on her clipboard. I continue to walk onto set, and since I'm early, I head to the refreshment tables. I'm preparing a coffee for myself when his voice is suddenly behind me.

"Good luck making that even close to drinkable."

I turn to find Changbin, closer to me than expected. He's dressed in black sweatpants and a black Celine t-shirt. He has a white baseball hat on, covering up his gorgeous hair, yet simultaneously darkening those eyes that make me so nervous.

"The coffee is bad?" I ask, trying to pretend that I wasn't weak in the knees from his unexpected arrival.

"Terrible. I don't know how they can serve it to us, honestly. I should've asked our manager to stop for us this morning."

"Thanks for the warning. Is there anything worse than bad coffee?" I set my cup back down on the table, rejecting it. Changbin looks up and purses his lips, like he's actually thinking about how to answer my rhetorical question.

"Being awake this early in the morning?" He answers.

"Being awake this early in the morning with no access to decent coffee." I correct. He laughs and flashes his white teeth at me. The way his eyes crinkle when he smiles drives a metaphorical stake through my heart.

"Here, let me get that for you." He gestures to my makeup cart that's parked next to me.

"Oh—you don't have to, it's not like I have to go very far."

He dismisses my refusal and picks up the cart. I wonder why he picks it up instead of rolling it, but then I see the way his bicep flexes and I decide that picking it up was definitely the better option. We walk together to the makeup room and he sets it down next to my chair. Heather is already in the room and she looks surprised when she sees him with me.

"Thank you, Changbin."

"You're welcome, Sage. I'll see you after wardrobe." He walks away, leaving me alone with her.

"Do you think playing a cute, helpless damsel will make him interested in you?" She accused.

"I'm not sure what you mean," I shrug. "He insisted."

She sneers at me. "Sure."

All of the guys are a little more chatty with me than they were yesterday. Changbin, Seungmin, Chan, and Felix are all collected around my chair as I'm working on Hyunjin. It feels so casual and I'm thankful that they are laid back enough to engage with me in this way. Changbin is sitting behind me on the makeup counter and we steal glances at each other every time I turn around to grab a product. I can't help but notice that nobody gathers around Heather's chair and I wonder if she's been rude to them before too.

It's now Changbin's turn and I feel giddy because I'm excited for the opportunity to touch him and look at him. His hair is styled the same way as yesterday and I'm also thankful that I stayed up too late last night watching videos on hair extensions.

"Look at you go!" Changbin smiles at me when I correctly clip one of his extensions in.

"I'm trying my best," I reply. "I want so badly do do a good job."

"You shouldn't ever doubt yourself." He catches my attention with an intense stare again. How does he do that?!

While we look at each other, I take the opportunity to comb my fingers through the extensions to blend them. I work my hands down the sides of his head and eventually to the nape of his neck. Suddenly I don't know what's gotten into me as I gently drag my fingers along each side of his neck and down to his collarbone, never once leaving his warm skin. I pretend to adjust his necklace so that I can leave my hands on him for as long as possible.

Changbin's eyes leave mine and land on my lips. I watch as the color of his eyes darken the longer he looks at my mouth and I can't help but wonder if he's as curious as I am.

Today, they're filming scenes that involve an alley and a subway. I stand by with my tools needed for touching up any of the looks, but of course I find that my focus is only on Changbin.

He's giving me whiplash. One moment I'm watching him goof around with his friends, doing tiny dances and aegyo. Then he starts performing and this man is the definition of duality.

During one of his verses in Maniac, Changbin drops his hips low and rocks them forward with one hand on his cheek and the other hand on his hip. He alternates rolling his knees inward during the dance move and I blush because it's so sensual. I can't decide whether to watch his face or his body. I think he notices me watching because he smirks and dances even harder. I silently pray that the director doesn't get the right shot and asks him to do the dance move over and over again.

* * *

At home, I can't help myself and I have to tell my sister about him.

"He's so handsome and so manly and he dances so well and he's been so nice to me." I blurt out.

"Slow down, fangirl!" Mila puts her hands up, bracing for impact.

"I'm sorry. I know when I say it out loud I sound crazy. It's just—I think, that maybe he might like me too."

"Just be careful, please. I don't want to see you hurt again. You're still putting yourself back together after last time."

"Changbin isn't like Dylan." I challenge her, but then I immediately wish I didn't say it. You sound so naive.

"You just met this Changbin guy. You don't know what he's like."

She's not wrong, but still, I can't shake the gut feeling that Changbin is something completely different than anything I have experienced. And I can't wait to find out.