Oh, My Heart! ✓

•22• Friends Don't Kiss

NOT EDITED

That night again they were sitting on the terrace of Aara's home. This time with soft mattress beneath them to provide some comfort.

Angvir was lying on Aara's lap. Her palm was caressing his soft hair. While his eyes looked into the infinity.

“Ang...” Aara mumbled softly.

“Hmm...” He replied, coming out of his thoughts.

“What sort of hallucinations do you get?” Aara was curious.

“The things that are on my mind more often.” He shrugged, totally disinterested in the conversation about his mental disorder.

“For example?” But she wasn't going to let go of this topic.

“You.” He looked at her.

“You mean you hallucinate me?” Her reaction amused him. Shock was written all over her face as if she hadn't expected this reply.

“Yes. For a few days I am hallucinating you.” He didn't go into details.

“And how do you differ between hallucinations and reality?”

“Expectations and reality. Hallucinations are what I am expecting to happen and reality is... well, reality.” He explained.

“How are you aware of your condition?” Questions were popping in her mind one after another.

“Sadly, I am way more self-aware than I should be.” He sighed.

“Why you never told anyone about it?”

“I told you about it.”He pointed out.

“I mean, why you didn't tell your parents about it?” She rephrased her words.

“I don't think telling them will make any difference.”

“That's really wrong of you.”

“I know, but I really don't care.”

“I had never imagined you'd be so insensitive towards your parents.” He was a guy helping out strangers, it was unexpected from him.

“Kiss me, Aara.” He smiled.

“Why would I do that?”She thought he was trying to distract her from the topic.

“Because I want to feel your lips against mine.”She felt that giddy feeling when he said that.

“Friends don't kiss, Ang.” But she knew giving in will only ruin their friendship.

“Aara, don't act like you are unaware of my feelings towards you.” He came open about his interest in her.

“I am intentionally ignoring your... feelings. I don't think you and I are compatible.”She looked away.

“Why do you think so?” He got up and sat in front of her.

“Because... being around you... makes me nervous. I don't feel myself. I feel conscious about what I say, how I act. Do you understand what I mean?” She wasn't sure if she was describing her feelings right.

“Nope.”He shook his head.

“Ang, you are a good looking guy. And I am an average girl. Your looks make me feel conscious about how I look.”  And she tried to use some serious words to express her concern.

“Seriously, Aara, you are rejecting me because I am good-looking?” Now that's what he concluded. And it didn't make sense to him.

“Yeah, I mean, I want to be with someone just like me. Average and middle-class.”And now she couldn't understand that why he couldn't understand her concern.

“Should I start wearing wrinkled shirts and worn out pants to look average and middle-class? We have different lifestyles so you find me different than you. Simple.”  He said in a very serious and angry tone. He wanted to scold her for saying that.

“That's it, we are different. Even you admitted it.” She said a little louder as if his words gave a justification for them to be not together.

“Aara, stop it. Take your time, think over it and then make a decision. Don't rush it, okay?”

“By the way, what am I supposed to think about?” She asked in confusion.

“About us, Aara.”

“But you didn't propose me or anything. Why should I think about is? We are not a thing. You are just my friend, that's it.” She quickly got up from the floor and went downstairs.

Ang walked behind her.

“Aara, I just told you that I am interested in you. And you don't want to think over it?”

“Yeah, because I am not interested in your interests. We are friends and we will be just friends. And if you want to be more than that, adopt me. I'll happily be your daughter.” She entered the kitchen, feeling hangry all of a sudden.

“Excuse me, I am only four year older than you, so legally that's not possible.”

“Whatever, just drop this topic.” She picked some capsicum and began chopping them.

“You are chopping my heart with your ignorance.” Ang spoke, feeling emotional and hurt.

“No, I am chopping capsicum with knife.” Aara wasn't ready to seriously talk about this certain topic.

“It was a terrible joke, Aara.” He complained.

“Then you may leave. Your presence is suffocating me right now.”

“I am not leaving.” Angvir declared stubbornly.

“Ang, you are leaving after our late-night dinner.” She declared as well.

And that's exactly what happened. He left as soon as they were done eating noodles.

That night, Aara couldn't sleep and Angvir slept peacefully. She was confused and he was happy.

A new chapter of their lives was going to begin. And their hearts were thumping in anticipation and excitement.

•••

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