TEAR STAINS

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4 months has gone by rapidly and everything has changed. Zak is now 5 and a half months old. Mine and my familys relationship is completely teared apart cause me and fiona had an argument about her being Zak's auntie and she hit me whilst I was breastfeeding Zak. Which is totally wrong cause she could have hurt Zak.

Me and Ian aren't as close anymore cause I'm always to busy to talk apparently. And we got into an argument about that too lips is off to college carls gone juvie and had gone all bad boy and we haven't spoken since he's left 2 months ago.

He got arrested for strapping heroin onto some boy that's is apparently my nephew cause I have a sister called sami now who Is by the way fucking psychotic and is not allowed anywhere near my son. Debbie's totally into guys now and has started to wear my clothes which piss me off and made me snap at her and that turned into an argument that  apparently is making her hate me for life.

And Frank well Frank is Frank I never liked him but he had a wife now Sheila who is also Karen's mother. Whilst on the other hand mickey has been so supportive and helpful with me and Zak and him and his family let us stay there for a few nights sometimes when my house gets to loud and hectic for Kozak.

Well there you go the quick catch up.
Right now Zak is napping on the bed with mickey who is on the phone with his friend called Bane (new characters alert) he's also apart of mickeys dad new scheme but I've never met him. He also has 2 other friends Nino and Gav which I also have never met but I know them 4 are really good friends.

I'm on the floor packing up the rest of Zaks stuff the house is finally ready to move into and I'm not hesitating to leave this shit whole and never look back. I'm also pumping whilst I do so. I hear a bunch of yelling downstairs and me and Mick look at eachother and he shrugs

I go downstairs too see that Debbie and Fiona are yelling at sami who is yelling back. "Why are you guys yelling Zak is trying to take a nap." I ask. "none of your business" they all snap at me. I run the hot water tap getting zaks bottle out and running it under hot water to warm it up like I always do.

"I just asked" I mumble. "were arguing about how it's her fault our brothers in juvie but you won't care" I turn facing Debbie. "of course I care what the fuck" I say annoyed. "really you haven't talked to him since hes left you didn't even go to his court case"

"well I'm sorry that I had to take my child to the hospital that day because he got an infection from this gross house." i yell at her and she scoffs. "be a better mother then" ouch. I turn around to grab zaks bottle but instead I see Frank drinking the milk out of it with the lid off.

"OMG FRANK WHAT THE FUCK" I yell in disgust. "what I was thirsty it's just milk you can't hog it all for the son of yours." what In the hell. "THAT'S MY BREAST MILK YOU IDIOT" his face drops. "oh that's why it's sweet." "your sick in the head for even drinking it out of my sons bottle" I grab the bottle off him and throwing it in the trash. I grab a new bottle and taking the breast pumps off me and drain as much milk as I have into a bottle. I just fed  Zak out of my left boob so that had less than the right.

I put the lid on the bottle and I didn't have to run it under the tap cause it comes out warm anyways.
"so when are you leaving" debbie's asks in attitude. "hopefully we'll be out by tomorrow." i tell her "good I can have your room then" I just nod

I grab zaks bottle before going back up the stairs. Tears slowly fall down my face everyone hates me when I'm just tryna do my best. I walk in my room and hand the bottle to mickey to put on the side for when Zak wakes up. He looks at me and looks away before doing a double take he looked confused to why I was crying. He was still on the phone bane but still opened his arm for me I kick my slippers off and crawl Into his arms as I laid on his chest and cried.

Im not a big crier but I have been crying about my family recently so be already knew what it was about. He wrapped his arms around me. One hand was holding his phone to his ear whilst the other stroked my hair.

He gave me random kisses all over to calm me down I do love this man a genuinely do. And this is exactly why. I cried for awhile letting everything out. "alright bro I gotta go yeah" once he got off the phone he fully wrapped himself around me and shushed me calmly in my ear.

"it's ok baby it's ok" he says rubbing my back. "I love you so much baby OK and I'm telling you it's alright it will all sort itself out I promise OK I promise" I nod wiping my tears and sniffling alot. I really hope he's right cause even though I'm on bad terms I do love them all from our highest moments to the lowest I love them and I don't want to let them go not now not ever.

Sorry it's short epilogue is longer

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