State of Grace: A One Direction Fanfiction

Eighteen:

I watched Harry as he tried to get comfortable on the mattress on my bedroom floor.  I watched as he tried to fit but then his feet would hang off and the blanket wasn’t big enough. I couldn’t help but laugh.

“Are you making fun of me?” He asked looking up at me.

“yes, yes I am.”

“Well it’s not my fault.”

“You’re just a giant.” I said laughing at him.

“eff you.” he said getting off of the mattress and coming to attack me in my bed. I screamed quietly and started laughing as he ticked me.

“Stop please.” i said fidgeting from the tickles. Then Charlie walked in with Tom.

“Hey!” He said laughing with Tom. Harry immediately stopped touching me.

“Young love, it’s so cute.” tom said.

“I remember being that age, it was a great time.” Charlie reminisced 

“You’re 4 years older than me?” I said holding Harry’s hand in my lap.

“Still you two are cute.” Charlie said kissing my forehead.

“Good night Grace.” He said leaving my room with Tom.

“I like Charlie.” Harry said.

“Everyone likes Charlie. He is just a likable person.” I said pushing Harry and he dramatically fell onto the mattress.

“You hurt me!” he cried out.

“You’re a terrible actor.” I laughed leaning down and kissing him. “Better?” I smiled.

“Almost.” he said kissing me again. A smile creeped across his face.

“So how did you like the first day in Texas?” I asked.

“I have been to Texas before Grace.”

“I know, but never with my family.”

“True. Your family is really great. They make me nervous though.”

“Harry since I met you, there have been a lot of things that made you nervous.”

“Well it’s I feel like I have to impress them.”

“You don’t have to impress anyone.”

“I feel like they are all so great and then there is old stupid me.”

“Harry you’re far from stupid or old.” I told him.

“I think I can be a bit stupid.”

“Everyone can be stupid. Just because you make one mistake in your life doesn’t make you stupid.”

“But that one mistake ruined my life.”

“Harry do you want to talk about it?” I asked holding onto his hand.

“Not really. Kind of.”

“Harry?” I said looking into his eyes. I could feel something there, like he was holding onto everything to make himself not cry. “Harry, I hope you know that you can trust me. I won’t tell a sole anything.”

“I know I can trust you. You and probably the boys are the only people I can trust. And my mom.”

“Harry I know what happened from articles in the paper. But not from you. I know articles can lie.”

“They didn’t though a majority of what they said was the truth.”

“Harry i’m going to be completely honest. You need to talk about it. Have you talked to anyone about it?”

“Not really.”

“Not even Louis?”

“He was too disappointed to talk to me. Even Liam refused to look at me.”

“But you are all such good friends now.”

“They forgave me because I begged for their forgiveness.”

“Harry you need to talk to someone. I’m here for you.” I said kissing him again. He took a deep breath.

“You won’t judge me or leave me.” he said.

“Never.”

“Okay. Well since you know the story because the entire world does I can make this kind of quick. I was out, it was just after the we finished the Third Tour. We were celebrating. I was completely wasted. I could barely even walk. Liam had to carry me out, but I didn’t let him. The rest of the boys were drunk, except Liam. But they weren’t as bad as i was. Louis was with Eleanor and Zayn with Perrie. I had hooked up with a few girls in the club except this one girl. She kept ignoring me. Didn’t want anything to do with me. I was angry with that. My ego got to my head and as we were leaving so was she. I told the boys that I would meet them home. They didn’t really think any thing of it, except Liam but I just shook him off. They left and I started to follow this girl down the street. i was incredibly creepy. I followed her until she made her way to a small apartment. It was dark and she was completely sober. I don’t even remember how I made it all the way there because of how the amount of alcohol I had consumed. I think she had noticed me following her and that’s when she called the police. The time she unlocked my door I had moved onto her. I grabbed her wrist which made her drop her keys, pocket book and phone. But that’s all the I did. She screamed and the police came. I was arrested on the spot. I was arrested for Domestic violence, sexual assault, public disturbance and ignorance to a police officer, because I refused to be arrested.”

“But you didn’t sexually assault her?”

“I know, but whatever. Luckily the girl blamed my alcohol and didn’t officially press charges. But when Liam came to pick me up at Jail I have never felt more guilty. It was the next morning and I didn’t even remember what I did. Liam and the rest of the boys really beat me up. I was killed in the papers and the paps got a lot of it on camera. It was awkward between me and the boys. They couldn’t look me in the eyes. When it hit the papers there was a different story in every magazine. It got bad when it said that I had raped a young girl. That was the worst that I saw. I couldn’t take it anymore and I lost it. I made a public statement and explained everything that happened. My management was devastated and so was my mom. She didn’t speak to me for months. When she finally did it was rough. That was the lowest point of my life. I became depressed and I stopped eating. We had a break and I avoided everyone in my life. I slept and cried all day and night. I barely left my bed. Fans got worried and they were also disappointed. I lost a lot of people but it got better. I started to see a therapist who helped me and got me to speak to Liam, Louis, Niall and Zayn. Niall was the first one to crack and start talking to me again. Louis was last because we were always so incredibly close. He actually punched me the first time we talked after it happened. Then we hugged it out.” 

I watched as Harry wiped away a tear that was falling from his eyes. I knew how hard it was for him to talk about something so personal. I got out of my bed and sat with him on the mattress. I held him in my arms as he cried.

“You see Grace, I made the worst mistake of my life. It changed me and the way people viewed me. The worst part was when One Direction broke up they blamed me. I couldn’t take that. We broke up a year after the whole thing happened because Louis got engaged, but the papers blamed me. They said that  my relationship with the boys was effected too bad, and we were drifting apart. It was all a lie. I was as close as ever with them. I still am.” he said getting angry. 

“Shhh. Harry don’t worry.” I said holding him in my arms tight.

“I was judged and it was the worst feeling in the world. From the time the band broke up to when I met you I went through my ups and downs. Then i met you and you made me better. You’re like a doctor that fixed my wounds. I am incredibly thankful for that. I don’t know where i would be if I never met you. Grace you’re like an angel sent from heaven. You don’t judge me for my rugged past or because I was in One Direction. You like Harry Styles. The normal boy from Holmes Chapel. I think I’m in love with you Grace.”

“Harry...” i stared at him again.

“I don’t think i’m in love with you. I know i’m in love with you.” He said kissing me.

“I. Love.You. Too.” I said muttering to him in between kisses and breaths.