Every Little Thing

Chapter Twenty

Ryder

It's been a couple days since I showed up at Blue's house and hung out with her and her brother. It went a lot better than I thought and although it was rocky at first, he and I ended up getting along and having a good talk. When she walked me out at the end of the night and we talked, it felt good to tell her how I feel and how I've always felt.

But like we both agreed, we wished we would have said it a lot sooner. I haven't talked to or seen her since and to be honest I've been avoiding Axel because I feel like I've betrayed one of my best friends.

It's a shit situation because he came to me and asked me to be honest and I couldn't be. I lied to him and give him permission when I should have told him the truth about how I feel about her. I feel like a complete prick and I know he would understand if I said something but it feels wrong.

I see how much he likes her when we all hang out or when he's smiling like a schoolgirl at practice when she texts him. She might also say they're "having fun" but I do know her enough to see through that shit; she has some feelings for him to.

So now I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. I paddled out this morning, early because I needed time to clear my head. Ever since she came back it's been jumbled, even Callan's noticed which is why we stopped sleeping together. She brought it up and I didn't fight it, because she's right I shouldn't be screwing around when ultimately I would like another shot with her.

I'm sitting on my board, right past the break. It's quiet and I'm the only one out here right now. I look out at the horizon and a wave of calm rushes through me. I stay on my board and watch the sun rise higher into the sky, before I paddle back to shore. When I get to the sand I strip out of my wetsuit and take a seat on my towel. Eventually I walk back to my truck and head home.

We have our first game next week and I keep trying to focus on that. The team is looking good and we have our shit together but if I'm distracted at all it's like a domino affect and the team will be the ones who suffer from it. I get out of the shower when there's a loud knock at my front door. I leave the towel around my waist and walk over to see who it is.

I open the door and Axel steps inside "Why did you lie to me?" He asks angrily.

"Lie? What are you talking about?" He paces.

"You told me to go after her and that you didn't care. Was it all horse shit?"

The realization sets in "She told you?" He laughs.

"Yeah she did, unlike you when we're supposed to be best friends man. You should have been honest with me from the start"

"What did she say exactly?"

"She wanted to end things between us because her heart was somewhere else... with someone else. Which means you obviously said some shit to her"

"Let me put clothes on so we can have a civilized conversation, yeah?" He takes a seat on the couch as I walk into my room to get dressed.

I throw on a grey shirt and a pair of black sweats and then walk out. I grab a beer from the fridge regardless of the fact that it's still the morning and hand on one to him "Thanks" he says as he takes it.

I take a seat next to him "You're right... I should have told you in the first place about how I felt. I didn't know where she stood and I didn't want to get in the way of you two if you liked each other"

He takes a long drink "It wouldn't have even gotten that far if you told Carson and I about her in the first place. Why didn't you?"

I sigh "Because it's hard for me to talk about and I'm ashamed of how it all went down. I love her... and I wasn't sure if I would ever see her again"