Every Little Thing

Epilogue

Blake

Four Years and three kids later here we are back at the beach. Ryder accepted the head coach position for the Los Angeles Chargers a few months ago, right after I gave birth to our little girl, Mila. I'm officially a stay at home mom with two wild kids and a new born but I absolutely love it. Being a mom and a wife has been the greatest gift ever given to me.

We bought a house in Oceanside because I didn't want to live directly in Los Angeles and its not too far of a drive for Ryder. We love that small town ocean vibe that we both grew up in. My days are now spent with a baby on my boob, while I chase the other two around the house and try to get some cleaning done. Ryder says we can hire help if needed but I love the chaos and there's no way I'm having some one help me raise my kids.

Atlas is in preschool four days of the week so typically it's just us girls at the house. But when Ryder is traveling during the season or has long practices in the off season, I feel like a single mom sometimes. Then he comes home and takes over, and gives me a break which is amazing. He is such an amazing father, over the years I've fallen in love with him even more as he became a dad. There's nothing sexier than watching the man you love be an incredible father to your kids.

Callan and Axel live nearby, they have a house fifteen minutes away. They have two boys who are wild and crazy just like Atlas. Axel is coaching for the Rams so it's fun when we get to play each other; they love friendly competition. Callan and the boys come over often or we go to their house and let the kids tear it up which is perfect when nap time comes around.

Carson and Serena have twin girls and a little boy now, he was born right before Mia. They live in Newport which is only an hour or so away, so we usually see them on the weekends. Carson is a head coach at one of the colleges now and loves it.

Stone is engaged (finally) and is expected to get married next summer. Corey is still living with his family in New York and they recently came and visited us which was so much fun. We all went to Disneyland for a weekend and had a great time before Ryder was off to work because the season started. My dad has been dating a woman named Kyra for a couple years now and I hope he pops the question eventually. I've never seen him so happy.

Right now I'm sitting in the sand building sand castles with Atlas and Ella. Ryder's holding onto Mila and talking with Axel while Callan's feeding their boys. It's such a beautiful day today, clear blue skies with not a cloud in sight. There's a cool breezes which makes the heat tolerable and the waves are perfect. I haven't paddled out in sometime but my goal is once I get Mia on a schedule to make time for myself.

I help dig the mote around the large sand castle when I glance out near the water and see a familiar brunette walking along with her sandals in her hand and a handsome guy walking beside her, holding her hand and throwing a ball for their dog that's running ahead of them; it's Riley. Ryder told me a few years ago what she admitted to him and I'll admit that it hurt me. It hurt that he waited so long, he said after everything happened that night that it didn't feel right.

We got into an argument about it but when I took a step back and put myself in his position, maybe I would have done the same thing? I was going through something traumatic and adding new like that could have pushed me over the edge. I was tired of allowing my past to dictate my future, so I got over it. When I look around me now at my beautiful family and the man I love, something like that seems so small. Although at the time it would have killed me.

I notice her small baby bump as she rests one of her hands on it and when I think back to that part of my life, I don't feel anything. It doesn't hurt to see her or think about what happened between us. It doesn't hurt to know she betrayed me because in the end, all of that pain and drama got me to where I am now.

I forgave her a while ago but I don't plan on ever trying to be friends again. After having Callan and Serena who have shown me ten times over what a true friend is, I would never consider it with Riley. She looks happy with her husband or boyfriend and her soon to be baby. That's all I want for her.

One of the biggest lessons I've learned after the ups and down I've experienced is that it's all worth it in the end. I couldn't see in those moments, the pain and hurt was blinding but once you move on from that you're able to see it all for what it was. I'm happy, so completely and foolishly happy and content with my life.

Ryder walks over and sits in the sand next to me as Mila crawls onto my lap. I bounce her up and down on my lap and kiss her chubby cheeks, Ryder pours a bucket of water into the mote and leans over to kiss my cheek. As crazy as it might sound, I would do it all over again if it mean that I got to be right here, right now with all of the people I love.

Nothing worth having comes easy.