JJK One shots

Choso Catchup!!

Dedicated to my 150 y/o big tiddy goth bf, Choso :) Happy October

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School Projects:
◇ oh buddy, I'm sorry you got partnered with him
◇ shows up to work on the project and falls asleep; ur just like pLEASE HELP ME
◇ *mumble mumble mumble* Choso they can't hear you (slightly louder mumbling)
◇ the teacher asks a pop question about your subject and Choso is just '...' like please sir I need this grade I literally wROTE YOU A SCRIPT
◇ you did alright ig, sorry

Love Language:
♡ Words of affirmation + touch :')
♡ gets kinda sad without his brothers so having you nearby even to just sit next to makes him smile
♡ you hold his hand and he's literally just :O he is ECSTATIC
♡ you tell him you lowkey like his little nose line and his goth gf vibe and he doesn't understand what that means but still appreciated the context
♡ sometimes when he gets sad and spacey u'll just stand next to him and (swoop) you are now holding hands and he's like I can feel it something has changed oh hi luv u :)

Tattoos + Piercings:
☊ Uh, yeah
☊ boy if you think he wouldn't get the MOST, you have no idea who Choso is
☊  sleeves, back tat, ALLLLL the piercings, talking ears, face, boy he is pimped out
☊  and he looks good doing it too :) 
☊ will wake Yuji up in the middle of the night to ask his opinion and the poor bby is like huh where am i oh hi choso... cHOSO? and goth boy is there like hi little bro do you think I should get this tattoo or this one I can't decide 

Taking Care of Baby Them:
❥ AHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhh cry :')
❥ he is SO quiet and sweet I just LOVE HIM AGH
❥ that vid of the kid pointing at a cat and going 'can I pet ur tiddies? :)'
❥ scared of fire idk y but he is; you got a birthday cupcake for him and he screamed when he saw the candle and cried until you put it out :(
❥ will NOT go to bed without saying goodnight to his brothers
❥ also demands one (1) book every night for he is a good boy

Vines They Quote:
☺is there anything better than pussy? yes, a really good book (synth noises)
☺there's only one race, the human race :) wHAT ABOUT NASCAR???
☺ we all die you either kill yourself or get killed (beatboxing) whatchya gon do? whatchya gon do?
☺ I do love working here, it's- we all have a lot of laughs (mahito opens his mouth) FUCK OFF JANET I'M NOT GOING TO YOUR FUCKING BABY SHOWER
☺ I'm just extremely happy can you tell by my face .-.
☺how do you know what's good for me? (geto, screaming) THAT'S MY OPINIONNNN (choso) o-o

Would They Punch You for $1 Million?
﹡He doesn't have any need for money, so prolly not
﹡ if he needed cash then yes :)
﹡ feels no remorse either
﹡ will apologize and take you to applebees or sumn to make up for your broken jaw

Pickup Lines:
❣ Are you Swedish? 'Cause ur the sweetest person I've ever met
❣ "who told you to say that?
❣ "geto :("
❣ "makes sense"

Taking Care of a Child:
▹he has lil brothers so he is PREPARED
▹bro when I say he has it all, he has it ALL; he even has a stroller that converts into a carseat that also converts into a carrier he is ready for this child
▹tries to teach it letters or numbers and the kid is just like :) and choso is too nice to be like no tiny human focus so he just smiles back and takes them out for ice cream
▹is in a mommy group on facebook fight me on it
▹ makes surprisingly good soup for some reason?? always makes you feel better when ur sick

Helping Hand:
⎔ he is the tired person who shows up late with coffee and looks like they are going to jump out of the window
⎔ points out where everything is from where you two are standing so he doesn't have to move
⎔ "let me know if you need any help" immediately falls asleep at his desk and your just like :) Im scared
⎔ makes eye contact with you in the cafeteria, then turns and leaves without saying anything :/