Degrees Of Honor The Honor Series Book One

Chapter 12

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Chapter 12

Cassie

I had planned to be gone this morning. In the quiet of the night, I watched shadows on the wall, listened to the wind and trees scrape against the roof. Those sounds and shadows that normally haunt me don't scare me tonight. I'm safe and I can rest knowing I won't rest until this is over once and for all.

I thought about what I should do most of the night. If Jacob and I disappeared, Dad would lose track of me again. And Travis could have the house to himself, he could stay if he wanted to. I could go west, as far as I can before needing to stop again. I might just lose Anthony for a bit longer as well. I could buy some time but not much without money.

I need a job. I can waitress, I can clean, I can even do minor repairs. I could earn a little and stay off the books for a short time. But Travis knows too much. He'd come for me now. He would be able to track me better than anyone else. I'd have to take that risk.

I can't put someone else in danger because of my mistakes.

I made my plans as we laid in front of the fire in silence. He held me, protectively, intimately, with his head resting against mine. I ran through several options, changing routes here, adjusting there. I went over the escape route repeatedly trying to find holes in my plan.

I assumed I would be running again when I learned of Travis's connection to my dad. I just need to be more careful. I don't want anyone getting hurt because of me. I couldn't stand it if Travis was hurt or worse because of me.

I didn't think it would be like this. I didn't think I would feel something for him. There's something growing between us. Something that shouldn't happen. It's not a good idea. For him, for Jacob. I need to go before I can't walk away. Cautiously, I wonder if there's anything I missed.

"You're not thinking of leaving me this morning, are you?" Travis questions me without opening his eyes. It's as if he can read my mind. That's not a good feeling. Once again, I feel his lips touch my skin.

Closing my eyes, I relished the moment. I need to set boundaries between us. I have a child to think of and I have to make better choices. Taking a deep breath and bracing myself for what I'm about to do, I prepared to lie to him.

"I have to leave soon." I'm not lying about that. "I have to take Jacob to daycare. And I have to go to work." I'm not saying what that work is.

He opens his eyes slowly and watches me. I can't tell if he believes me. "What aren't you saying, Cassie? Don't say it's nothing, because I can see it in your eyes."

Yep, he sees everything. "I think we need some rules." His eyebrows lift at my suggestion.

"Rules?" He doesn't make a move to sit up or pull away.

"Yes." Sitting up, I make the first move to step back. Crossing my legs under me, I adjust so I can see him. "I'm a single mom. My son takes priority in my life. I can't just jump into bed with the first man I come across. Or any man, for that matter. I have to be better for him."

"Better for him? Or for you?" He asks calmly. There's a flash of anger in his eyes but he doesn't show his temper. If I wasn't staring at his eyes, I would have missed it.

Travis gets a lopsided smile on his face, but it's not a real smile. He's humoring me. Does he think this is a joke? Really? I thought last night, after all those kisses and heat that were between us, we were on the same page.

Feeling my defensive nature kick in, I have to not give him my knee jerk response when I feel I'm not being taken seriously. Slowing down my breathing I pause and consider my words carefully.