Degrees Of Honor The Honor Series Book One

Chapter 19

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Chapter 19

Travis

Slowly, I moved across the room to Cassie. Sitting on the couch next to her, I gently took her hand into mine. In a way to calm her and myself, my thumb gently ran over the back of her hand. Keeping my eyes on hers, I lifted our joined hands and brought them to my lips. Placing a kiss inside the palm of her hand, I kept my eyes on hers keeping her attention on me.

Her eyes shimmered with tears, as she stared into mine. I don't have to ask, I already know the answer to my questions. Those deep wells I'm looking at hold the painful truth. I could easily get lost in them if I hadn't figured out the truth of what happened to her. She can no longer hide from her past. She is no longer safe here. Any chance of keeping her out of harm's way is lost.

Knowing that the Colonel will want an update and quite possibly be on the first plane here, I need to prepare her for what's to come. I should have known the last thing Cassie wants is my sympathy. She's got her pride and that's fragile enough as it is. I don't want to make it worse.

But she saw it on my face, the one thing I was trying to avoid. She saw the sympathy I felt for what had been done to her. She saw my temper against the man who had tormented her. Not pity or shame towards her, but anger against the man who hurt her. Fury towards the man who dared to put her through this kind of agonizing abuse.

She doesn't want sympathy and she definitely doesn't need pity. She's stronger than she knows and her pride has carried her this far. Unfortunately, I can see that misery she's been carrying on her shoulders is weighing her down. What Cassie needs is someone to care about her, to see her with dignity and respect, and who will want her without causing her more harm.

It all seems so clear in this moment, her over protectiveness of Jacob, the bravado she demonstrated when I first arrived here. From the way she quickly backed down during a fight, to her unwillingness to let me get too close to her. Cassie has closed off her emotions every chance I thought I would break through the barrier she's erected. It isn't entirely because she is afraid of Anthony. We both know if given an opportunity, Dean would hurt both of us without blinking an eye.

Cassie's fear runs deeper than that. It's more like she is afraid of me. She is afraid I will treat her the same way Dean had. She is scared as hell that I'll be the one to break through that wall and destroy what little respect she has left for herself. I can't allow her to feel this way. Not about me. Not about whatever it is that's beginning between us.

Taking a deep breath before I address the monster in the room, I try to will away any anger I'm feeling. None of my fury is directed at her. None of it will ever be aimed in her direction. Cassie has to understand that single fact before we can move forward.

"What else did he do to you, Cassie?" I'm treading on shaky ground with this question. I doubt she's ready to go into detail with me but this has to get settled before we can move on. "Before you found out you were pregnant, what else did he do to you? And don't say nothing. I can see it on your face. I know it's more than you're comfortable telling me about. But you have to, Cassie. You have to tell me everything or I can't do my job. "

Her eyes filled with tears as the memory of what he had done, of the pushing and shoving and the horrendous ways he violated her flooded through Cassie. The thought of him touching her is making me sick. Without her saying a word, I knew it was much worse than I expected. From the pained expression on Cassie's face, she is reliving the horror.

How many times had she been forced to have sex with him? How badly had Anthony hurt her in the process of forcing himself on her? He broke her down physically and emotionally until the only thing left was a shell of the woman she was. Where was the strength and determination of the independent woman who greeted me at the screen door? What happened to the pride she once held so tightly, that it blocked her from seeing the mistake she was making?