chapter sixty one: a wise talk

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Rolling into her driveway I started to prepare myself.

Not that I was going to see him, he wasn't even at home. He was hooked up to machines at the hospital.

But I couldn't shake the fact that just a few months ago I had come here and everything felt—homey, alive.

Now as I walked through the door all I could feel was looming grief. My stomach twisted and turned. It was like death was just hovering over the house.

And I didn't like it one bit.

"You remember where the room is, right?" Addie asked.

"Yeah." I sighed.

"The bathroom is the door before it if you want to shower." she told me in between a yawn.

"Thanks, I'll see you in the morning." I nodded at her before heading down the hall.

Unzipping my bag, I took out my pajamas and went into the bathroom. My shower was quick and I slipped under the sheets within twenty minutes.

I saw my phone light up and took it off the nightstand. It was an old notification so I just cleared it.

In doing so I unlocked my phone and swiped up. I don't know what possessed me, but I went into my messages.

I skipped over all the recent texts everyone sent me and went straight to my conversation with Hunter.

I scrolled back and looked at all the messages we've sent each other over the past weeks.

It wasn't a lot as I was always at their apartment or he was at my place. So most of it was "Here" or "I'm outside."

But for the rest of them it was a conversation that always ended with the same words.

"Love you."

I looked at the words longer than I should've before turning my phone off. I plugged in the charger before rolling over and trying to sleep.

~~~~~

The next morning I woke up pretty late. I hadn't gone to sleep until around three in the morning.

And it's all because I couldn't stop looking at those texts. I kept my phone on the charger but I sat up all night just re-reading them.

When I checked the time, getting out of bed, I kind of surprised myself. It was almost twelve.

Shit.

We said we were going to leave the house at twelve.

I walked into the living room to see if Addie was up. When I found her mother on the couch I couldn't not greet her.

"Oh, hi Angie." I waved at her. "Do you know if Addie's up?"

"Oh sweetie, she's been gone for hours now." she shook her head and stood up.

"She left already? We're supposed to leave at twelve." I contested.

"I think she meant you'll be there at twelve. Addie's down there at nine when visiting hours open." she let out a small laugh.

"Oh."

"Don't worry about it, I'll call her back. She's been there long enough." She gives me a reassuring smile.

I give her one back but can't overlook how easy she makes talking about the situation look. I mean she's calm, she's trying to reassure me when the roles should be reversed.

"I'm sorry if this is an intruding question, but how come you don't seem as worried as Addie?" I ask.

She sighs and leans against the counter in the kitchen. "Well, I've been with John for...22 years now. When I married him I chose to be with him in sickness and in health."

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