caught in the upside down

past and pain

Joyce POV:
I sat behind the counter and sighed , since the new mall called "Starcourt" opened we barely had customers and not much to do, it annoys me.

Hopper POV:
I had my lunch break and decided to drive over to Melvald's General Store for sure Joyce would be there and i have to ask her for help because of that Wheeler kid. I arrived and step on to the store where she sat at the counter and damn , she looks so beautiful! "Oh hi hop" she said and smiled and i couldn't look away , those eyes... she looks so incredibly beautiful! "What now?" she sighed which brought me back to reality i took off my hat and sighed "Wheeler" i said "Michael?" she asked confused "yes" i said and walked over to her "what did he do?" she asked and stood up "he and El they are kissing the whole time!" i said " and where is the problem? they are teenagers hop , that's what they do!" she said " yeah but they do it the whole time! Literally! That's not healthy and not good! He is a problem" i said and leaned against the counter " you wasn't any better in that age , they are in love and isn't it good that El has someone who loves her?" she said " yes but not that Wheeler kid , i don't like him" i said "Michael is a good boy Hopper , if it bothers you then you have to talk with them" she said " talk?" i asked "yes , you sit down with them and talk with them heart to heart and i said talking not yelling" she said i sighed and sat down at the counter. " Just try it " she said and sat next to me ,  i nodded and looked at her she looks so sad and exhausted. " How are you?" i asked " i'm okay " she said and looked down at the ground " you know that you can talk with me if something's wrong" i said and laid my hand on her hand.

Joyce POV:
His warm hand laid on mine and it gave me so much comfort i don't know how just his touch can comfort me. " It's just Laura" i finally said "it's been two years today and there is no day which i don't think about her " he said i looked at him and tried to hold back my tears " me too" i said and looked away. " I love her and i am still giving me the fault that she died , i feel guilty for not being there for her and i am sorry , i am so sorry Joyce" he said and squeeze my hand  " no hop , it's not your fault" i  sobbed " but i feel like it is Joyce , i could have given her a better childhood! I should have been there for you all! You gave her a wonderful childhood as a amazing mother figure and i should have been there for her ... I am her father" he said and it was the first time which i saw him emotional and the first time hearing him talking about her like that. " I am so sorry Joyce" he said and took my hand into both of his hands "it's not your fault hop" i said "it is , i even let you go alone through all this pain ... damn Joyce i am so sorry really" he said and his eyes filled with tears " Hopper don't do that to you" i said  he kneeled down in front of me , took my hands into his hands again and laid his head on my lap , he softly started sobbing " i'm sorry , i am so sorry" he repeated " no stop Jim , don't apologize don't do that to me" i sobbed and made him look at me  " we both made big mistakes but it's no one's fault that she died... it was them and not you or me" i said and my own tears ran down my cheeks he pulled me into a tight hug "we can't change the past" i whispered and wrapped tighter around him.