Chapter 18

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A/N: The following scenes get quite dark. This chapter has slight mention of past rape and pregnancy loss. Please don't read if this is triggering.


Carina

When Dumbledore stops to congratulate me on the bond, I have reached my limit. His comments on how happy he was to see me associating with light families is just making it worse. Thankfully Lord Potter comes to distract him, and I make my way down the hall. I needed to get my magic under control, but the more I try, the harder it fights back. I can't keep it bottled up anymore and walk to the nearest floo. If I didn't leave soon, I will do something that I regret. I make it to the Black manor fearing that if I go home, I will scare the kids. There would be no way to hide unstable magic from Regulus. Memories of events I pray never come true eat at me. The moment I step into the dueling room I scream allowing my magic to release. The pain of holding it for so long causes tears to run down my cheeks. I swear I can hear the screams of my friends dying. A voice whispers that I was failing them. That I was not enough to stop this. If I couldn't handle being in a room with them, how was I to defeat them? I am all alone. I was never meant for this time and would only screw everything up. As the dark voices get louder, my magic continues to flare. As I hear Harry's voice tell me that I had failed him, I hit my knees.

Rabastan

I go looking for Carina but can't find her anywhere. I knew that this was hard on her, and I hated leaving her alone for so long.

"Has anyone seen Carina?" I ask lord Black who is with my father, lord Winters, and Orion.

"No, the last I saw her she was speaking with Dumbledore." Lord Black says.

"I got called away and when I turned around, she was gone. Bellatrix hasn't seen her either." I tell him.

"Do you think she would of went home?" Lord Winters asks.

"I doubt it, she looked on edge and she wouldn't want to frighten the children." Orion says.

"I also don't see Marvolo. I hope he doesn't try to corner her." My father says and it takes everything in me not to clench my fists. An elf pops in next to lord Black.

"Sir, Carina is at the manor. She does not seem to be ok." It says. Lord Black nods and turns back to the group.

"I will go check on her, Rabastan it might be good for you to come with me." I nod and follow him to the floo.

"Did she say anything to you?"

"No, but I caught her staring at lord Nott." I tell him.

"None of us had thought of that, but many families have distinctive features. I would not doubt if she was seeing those she remembers from her time."

We say nothing more as we floo to the manor. An elf points to the hall leading to the dueling room. We step in and I am thankful for the barrier keeping her magic contained.

"What is happening?" I ask as I see her on the ground.

"She has denied her core for too long. Tonight had been too much, and it lashed out. Thankfully she is within the wards."

"How do we help?" I didn't want to just leave her there.

"Unfortunately, there is nothing we can do. She will stop when her magic runs out. It will take a few days for her to recover. We will need to keep a better eye on her core. If this was to happen somewhere else, she could be deemed unstable."

"If you want to go back to the ball, I will stay with her." I say. I refuse to leave her.

"I will need to, or it could cause questions. Have an elf take her to the hospital wing when she calms down. She will likely pass out so do not be alarmed." He says and I nod. I move over to one of the seats and wait for her to burn through her magic.

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