"My love
I send this smile over to you
Disarm you with a smile
And leave you like they left me here
To wither in denial
The bitterness of one who's left alone
Ooh, the years burn
Ooh, the years burn, burn, burn...."
-Disarm
Smashing Pumpkins Siamese...
I don't know if this will get read or not, if it does cool, if not cool.
I am taking a hiatus for the month of November. November is not a good month for me. Some of you that have been reading for a while know that in November of 2020 my mom passed away very suddenly and it's still a loss I'm coping with and navigating. I'm navigating other losses also...
Full disclosure since the end of July my mental and emotional health has not been great either.
I've finally settled into my new home, but that has resulted in a pretty nasty falling out with the only parent I had, and I haven't spoken to my father since my biopsy in July. I had a cancer scare-my third one since January of 2020-not that I keep track.
Like I said I'm still navigating the death of my mother which as of late has felt heavier; I didn't have her to call when I had my final heartbreak in July. Yeah, final... I'm done. I've told myself that before, but I truly mean it.
I am not going to talk shit on this person, they did nothing to deserve that. I thought we were one another's end game... And, I'd love to say "Oh, I don't care, or I don't love them." I do care and I do love them with my entire mosaic heart...which is sad.
Sorry.
I'm taking a hiatus for the month of November. I might be back in December, I might not. I don't know yet.
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