Unknown Feelings|| Max Mayfield

AFTERMATH

*THREE MONTHS LATER*

Max felt empty, every time she closed her eyes she just pictured a dead Alex on the floor in front of her.

But she had to go on. It's what Alex would've wanted. She just wished at night that he was with her cuddling listening to tears for fear just like before...

Max decided to put on a happy face today as it was the Byers last day and they were taking El with them

She tried to make it seem as if it didn't effect her however on the inside she was breaking down

                                     -

"Turn around, look at what you see!" Max and Lucas sing, "in her face, the mirror of your dreams!"

The two sing in the Byers' house as they help them pack up for their move to California.

"Rhymes that keep their secrets, will unfold behind the clouds!" the duo continues. Apparently Dustin and his real girlfriend, Suzie, gave quite the performance over walkie on the night of the mall fire.

"Wait, did we get that verse right? It's 'unfold behind the clouds'?" Max asked trying to annoy the boy

"Yeah, but you're butchering it, so could you please stop?" he huffs

"So then join in, Dusty-bun," Lucas teases puckering up his lips making fake Kisses

"Yeah, come on, Dusty-bun, why don't you join us?" Max giggles

"You guys are so funny, you should be on Carson," he answers back sarcastically.

"Can't we just head your rendition?" she asks

"No," he shuts down

"Please? Just one verse?" she begs

"No! No way. It's reserved for Suzie's ears and Suzie's ears alone," he exclaims. The room falls silent.

Max and Lucas look a each other one more time coming on a mutual agreement

"Turn around," they start again, "look at what you see!"

Dustin pulls the finger on them yet still they continue on

                                      -

It had finally been time to say goodbye.

Max couldn't hold it in anymore tears streaming down her face.

Both her and El had lost two important people in their life so they understood what they were going through but now she was leaving Max didn't know who to talk to.

After she had hugged the rest of them she came up to El and engulfed her in a tight hug El did the same tears felt on both of their clothes

"I'll miss you, take care of your self okay?" El asked her

Max just nodded her tears blocking her from speaking.

"I'll miss you too El, don't forget to visit" Max said with a small smile as they both went in for a hug again

-

When Max came home she went straight to her closet picking up her favourite hoodie of Alex's

She put it on and laid in bed taking in the scent of his jumper. Then she felt something in the picked so and she found a letter. Addressed to her.

She hesitantly opened it contemplating whether if was from Alex or someone else. Inside was a audio tape. Max quickly got up and picked up her headphones

Dear Max,

If your hearing this I'm so so sorry. I know... I know I promised you. But i just wanted to say something I never said enough. I love you so fucking much and don't ever forget it.

Shit now there are going to be tears on the envelope.

See when I first met you you had no idea how important you were to me. I felt connected to you and I could just stare at you for hours on end. Yeah I got jealous a lot of Lucas because he liked you too back then but when I found out you liked me back it was as if my life was complete in a way

You filled that hole Maxine, you gave me a reason to go on. When El wasn't there and i lashed out at you so many fucking times you stuck with me. And i am indeed thankful for that

But can you.. can you promise me something Max?

Promise me you'll live on.

You'll continue to laugh, you'll make sarcastic jokes to the party, you won't disconnect. I know you Max, and I know that you like to push people away because we both do it.

But I beg please please please don't stop living your life because of me. I would hate to know that i caused that.

Your my person. Your my soul mate Max and for the time I have lived the only thing I would change is to have know you for longer.

Your special Maxine. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. You're the only one I wouldn't mind loosing sleep for, the only one I can never get tired of talking to and the only one who crossed my mind constantly throughout the day

Your the only one that can make me smile without trying to bring down my mood, without the intention to affect my emotions with every action of yours.

I can't explain with just words how much you mean to me but you, El, Lucas and Hopper are the only people I was afraid of loosing so I decided to end it before my nightmare became a reality.

I'm gonna quickly finish what I have to say before the tape runs out

I just hope you look over this. The ring I made for you I don't know if I gave it to you i hope I did. It symbolises your fiery personality keep it. And if you find my body please give the lightning one to El

All i hope is that your thinking about all those fun times we had during the summer, don't focus on the bad, i know how easy it is, and how often you do it.

With all my heart and love,

                                                     Alex