The European Enigma (LSD, #9)

6. The Bosnian and Herzegovinian Beehive

The Bosnian and Herzegovinian Beehive

The Boss looked at his watch. He was getting angry. He had no time for this. There was something wrong with these people. First, they suggested a meeting at the classy terrace of The Tea Garden, in the centre of Luxembourg, a public place, to demonstrate what they called «the future of discovering secrets». According to «The Book» (written by Ian Fleming and Len Deighton), talking about secrets has to be done behind closed doors, now and in the future, but the Bosnian and Herzegovinian spies probably had read a different book. And on top of that, they were late. When you agree to meet each other at 14:00, you have to be there at 14:00. You should even be there at 13:50, so you don't waste the precious time of the person you try to sell your product to.

The Boss looked at his watch again: 14:13 already. «If they're not here by 14:15, I'm leaving, and I don't want to see them again.», he thought. The waiter came to his table for the third time now, to ask if he wanted to order.

"Not yet. I'm waiting."

"I'm the waiter. I'm waiting for you to order.", the waiter said.

"You're a waiter. I order you to wait.", The Boss grunted.

Two strangely dressed ladies stumbled between the tables and almost fell on the chairs in front of The Boss: "Sorry we're late." - "We couldn't find it." - "Before we tell you about the birds and the trees." - "And the flowers and the bees." - "I want a flower tea with honey, please." - "Me too." - "And I would like one of those scones with cream." - "Me too."

The Boss stood up and held out his hand to present himself: "No names, please. You can call me Mister Luxembourg. Are you Miss Bosnia? Or are you Miss Herzegovina?"

The woman in the pastel pink dress took his hand and turned it, so she could read the lines on the palm: "Interesting. Your lifeline is rather short and your heartline shows a clear interruption. You live under a lot of stress. If you don't change your lifestyle drastically, you will suffer a heart attack before your next birthday. And your mountain of Venus shows your wife, having an affair with a younger man."

The other woman, dressed in a long pastel blue dress, took a deck of tarot cards out of her purse and laid them on the table. In a low voice, she explained: "Sit down, please, Mister Luxembourg. Someone might watch us. You're just an innocent tourist who asked two mysterious ladies to tell him about his future. Hm. This doesn't look good. Two jacks surround the golden queen. The king is followed by the card of death. It looks like your wife is having an affair with two rich men at the same time, and you'll have a serious health problem before your next birthday."

The Boss was losing his temper: "Do you mind if we get to the point? I don't have all day."

The blue lady nodded to her pink sister: "I thought so: too much stress, no time to pay attention to his wife, not enough sex to relax, which causes a chain of rising conflict, and now she is looking around for a better partner."

The Boss turned red: "We're not here to talk about my marriage. We're here because you wanted to demonstrate an advanced technique, interesting for me and my organization. If you don't stop wasting my time right now, I'll leave."

"Don't leave. The tea is on its way.", the pink lady said.

The blue lady added: "Meanwhile, I want you to have a look at this. First, put this little earplug in your ear, so you can hear what's going on."

She handed The Boss a mobile phone. It showed a video. The Boss put the earplug in his ear and heard a familiar voice. With eyes wide open, he watched the screen: "When did you record this?"

"It's not recorded. It's live.", the pink lady explained.

On the screen appeared a night table with an alarm clock and a small lamp. The clock showed the date and the time: today, 14:17. The Boss knew that clock. It woke him up every morning. The earplug gave some interesting information too. The familiar voice groaned: "Oh. Yes. Higher. Yes. That's it. Oh, that's good. Don't stop. Don't stop." It was the voice of his wife.

"What's this?"

The pink lady took the phone out of his hand and looked at the image: "A nightstand. One. Night. Stand. But it's daytime now, so there's nothing to worry about."

With a professional gesture of kindness, the blue lady removed the earplug from his ear. Behind the veils that hung over their broad summer hats, the women seemed to be amused: "Are you interested in buying our product?"

The Boss almost jumped on the table: "I'm interested in seeing who's in that room. What's going on there?"

"You have to pay first."

"How much?", The Boss shouted.

"Please, calm down." - "People are looking at us." - "First, we'll have tea." - "There comes the waiter."

The waiter filled the table with tea and sweet pastries, the women tasted the scones, and The Boss paid the bill: "How MUCH?"

"We thought..." - "Fifty thousand euros."

"WHAAAT? For that money, I can hire two field agents for a year."

"We know." - "It's too cheap." - "We've worked more than a year on this project." - "We should have asked a hundred thousand."

"How about five thousand?"

"This is not the street market, Sir." - "If you don't like our price, we'll go to somebody else."

The Boss wanted to explode, but he forced himself to remain calm: "Okay, okay. And what do I get for fifty thousand euros?"

The two women worked like an experienced team. When one had her mouth full, the other one spoke, until she wanted to eat the next bite, and then her soul sister finished the sentence: "This is a bargain." - "We've developed this..." - "... together. Bosnia did the technology..." - "Herzegovina did the biology." - "The technology consists of a mini camera, a mini..." - "... microphone, and a mini transmitter." - "To move this unit from one place to another," - "we started to develop a mini-drone," - "but we soon found out it used too much energy," - "and it was impossible to enter conference rooms or private offices without being noticed." - "So we used the power of Mother Nature instead." - "We bred a special race of bees," - "strong enough to transport the ear-eye-send-unit..." - "... and we trained them to follow our orders." - "That was the most brilliant part of the plan." - "The bee reacts to smell and taste." - "You mark your target with a little bit of honey." - "The bee will follow her and pass on everything she says or does." - "These scones are delicious." - "And it's a classy terrace too." - "I'm glad we picked this place." - "We should come here more often."

The Boss left his tea turn cold: "Do you want those fifty thousand in cash, or do you prefer a cheque?"

"Cash, of course." - "And not in the open, please." - "A discrete envelope under the table will be fine."

The Boss made a brief phone call. Two minutes later, a young woman on a bicycle stopped at the table with an envelope: "Give it to the ladies, please. Can you give me the monitor and the earplug now?"

The pink lady handed him the desired while the blue lady let the envelope disappear: "It was nice doing business with you."

"Hey, wait a minute. Where are you going? The image has changed. What happened to that bedroom? I want to see that man, or those men, and that woman. Hey! How does this work?"

The pink lady turned around and pointed at the honey on the table: "You have to mark the spot first. The bee has to know where it has to go."

The Boss looked at the monitor, surprised to see his own red-hot head, looked around, and saw a fat bumblebee land on the remainders of the scones and the cup with honey. He shouted at the bee: "You! Go back! You have a mission!"

The waiter, who came to clean up, smashed the bee with a rolled-up newspaper. He explained to the squashed bumblebee on the table: "This is a classy terrace. No bugs allowed."

The waiter's next task was to call for an ambulance because the man at the table suffered a heart attack.