The European Enigma (LSD, #9)

33. The Portuguese Professor

The Portuguese Professor

The professor loved this place. He saw skies of blue and clouds of white, as the bright blessed day scared the dark sacred night, as he thought to himself: «what a wonderful island is Madeira.»

He enjoyed the breeze, and he liked to watch the human beehive around the small port, where seagulls shouted insults at each other while the perfumes of salt water and fresh fish fought for dominance. He did his best thinking here on this terrace. And today, he needed his best thinking. His espresso was getting cold on the tiny table. The fire in his pipe slowly died. He wrote the numbers on his notepad, shaking his old head. This was indeed one hell of a problem. Could it be done? It had to be done. The man had been clear about what would happen if he didn't find a solution. It had to be done.

The math was the simple part. In 2026, 72 countries will compete in the tournament. We start with 20 matches between the 40 C-countries. The winners play another 20 matches against the 20 B-countries, for a place among the final 32, of which the 12 A-countries are automatically qualified. Then we play in 8 groups of 4 countries, 6 games per group. The best two of each group play the eighth-finals, then the quarter-finals, the semifinals and, finally, the small final for places 3 and 4, and the big final to find out who wins eternal glory for being FIFA World Champion. That makes 104 matches, to be played in 5 weeks. 40.000 spectators per match make 4 million people. 100 euros per ticket makes 400 million euros. It was the price of a modern football stadium, but 104 matches in 5 weeks required... 24 stadiums. You can't build 24 stadiums for 400 million...

And there was also the problem of those 4 million people. Where do they sleep? Where do they park their car? How do they get there and back home again? Infrastructure would cost a lot more than 400 million...

The profit of a FIFA Football World Championship was, of course, for FIFA. Only the entrance tickets were for the organizing country; the TV rights and the sponsorships were for the FIFA head office in Zurich, where the millionaires in charge would do wonderful things with the 20 billion euros that those 104 matches would generate. FIFA had only one tiny little problem: they had to find a country with enough economic power to organize the 2026 tournament. There was only one country capable of doing so: the USA, but football was called 'soccer' there and nobody was interested because the USA is only interested in «America First!» and they would never become World Champions. And, of course, in 2026, FIFA wanted to celebrate the tournament in a European country.

There was one candidate. They had given the workability problem to a Portuguese professor on a sunny terrace near the harbour of Funchal, on the island of Madeira. How do you build 24 football stadiums for 400 million and still make a profit?

The professor stirred his coffee, absentminded. He was a scientist. He had to look at it scientifically. The biggest problem came in the last round of the group stage, where eight games were played on the same day, in pairs of two at the same time. That meant that at least eight stadiums had to be available at the same time, and you can't play every game on the same field, so you needed 24 fields...

BANG!

There was the brilliant idea.

You needed 24 fields, but that didn't mean you needed 24 stadiums. You could move the stadium from one field to another... Make the stadiums light and removable... You play a match on field A on Monday, you move the stands in the night to field B, and you're ready to play the next match there on Tuesday...

The professor was delighted. He lit his espresso and drank his pipe, noticed his mistake, ordered a fresh espresso, lit his pipe, and blew a blue circle of smoke. Thanks to this brilliant idea, the rest was easy. He needed to call the man.