You are my home

Sunday, September 2, 2007

Melissa

I'm impatiently waiting in the park for Emma to come. I just got back from my tour of the country. I didn't expect to last the full six weeks, but it really did me good. I also discovered that we actually live in a pretty nice country. I get up from the bench when I see Emma running towards me. As soon as she is with me she jumps into my arms. " I missed you so much". I didn't really see this coming and can just prevent us from falling over. "I missed too, but did you already know that you are heavy?". She comes out of my arms and gives me a little push. "We are definitely not going to do this again. No contact for six weeks". I give her a small smile. I sit down again and Emma follows suit. "How long have you been back?". Emma continues to look at me for a moment. "So you're really not going to talk about the fact that I haven't heard from you for six weeks?". I sigh. "Sorry, but I really needed it". She gives me a nod. "Are you going to tell me what's going on?" I stare straight ahead. "I had to get some things straight". Emma sits close to me and puts an arm over my shoulders. " What kind of things?". I sigh and cover my face with my hands. "I-I've developed feelings for someone I shouldn't have." I say sighing. When it stays quiet I look at Emma. She gives me a small smile. "Valerie". I'm a bit surprised when I hear her say that. Finally I nod. "Is it so clear?". She starts laughing. "I was wondering when you would find out for yourself. I can see it for so long". I sigh. "I don't know what to do. I had hoped leaving would help, but it didn't really." Emma gives me a smile. "Maybe you should talk to her about it." I look at her in disbelief. "She won't want anything to do with me any more." She shakes her head. "Mel, that won't happen anyway. I actually think she shares your feelings." I look at her with wide eyes. "You're crazy. Val doesn't like women and certainly not someone who is her student and so young". She's really gone crazy. "Have you asked her that before?" I shake my head. " Of course not. I don't understand how you can think like that." Emma sighs. "Mel, I see the way she looks at you and the way she treats you. You also don't want to know how worried she is about you. I have been in contact with her almost every day and each time she asked if I had heard from you."

There's no way Valerie feels anything but friendship for me. I don't want to talk about it any further. I just want to try not to think about my own feelings as much as possible. "Let's stop talking about it. How long have you been back?" Emma nods in understanding. She realizes that I really don't want to talk about it anymore. " Three days". " How was it?". She has a beautiful smile on her face. " Really amazing. It was so nice to be close to Sofia again. I really missed her a lot. She also lives in a really nice area." I give her a smile. "Also a good nightlife?" She shakes her head. "Sofia lives in a quiet area for that matter". " That's a pity. No exciting adventures, then?". I say with a wink. I then see something change in Emma's expression. "N-Not really". I look at her questioningly. "So?" She shakes her head. "Are you coming to me? Mr. and Mrs. Morrison will not be home until late tonight. I can smuggle you in without them noticing. That way you have a restful night before we have to go back to school tomorrow". I look at her questioningly. "Emma what are you not telling me?". She sighs. " It's nothing. Shall we go?" I nod. I'll leave it alone for now, but I'm sure there's something she won't tell me right now. "I will come to you in half an hour. Then I can get my stuff first". She nods and then we both go our separate ways.

I've been standing at Emma's door for a while. I'm scared when it opens. I hadn't even knocked yet. " She's not here". I look at Emma questioningly. "Valerie". So she apparently realized I was staring at Valerie's house. " How do you know that?". She gives me a smile. "I talk to her almost every day". I give her a nod and then walk in with her. We walk straight to Emma's bedroom. Where she plops down on the bed. I sit on the couch. "You know you can come here too". I look at Emma with a smile. She says it over and over, but I'm not into being close to anyone. "Yeah, but you know me". She gives me a nod. "Mel, what else is going on? I can see that you are concerned about something and that it is not all about Valerie". I sigh. "I need to find another place to sleep. They're going to demolish it where I am now. I have until next Wednesday to find something, but that will be fine". She looks at me with wide eyes. "I don't want to talk about it right now." Emma turns on the TV. She knows there's no point in going on about it now. We watch TV in silence until it's time to go to sleep.

I wake up falling off the couch. I look around and luckily quickly recognize where I am. I hear screaming coming from below and I know I'm the cause of it. I change quickly, brush my teeth, grab my things and go downstairs. As soon as I enter the kitchen it immediately falls silent. " Good morning ". I say softly and a little shyly. "Good morning Melissa". Says Mrs Morrison. "Sorry Mel". I nod understandingly to Emma. " We have to go. Otherwise we will be late". I want to walk out of the kitchen again, but am stopped by Mrs. Morrison. "Melissa I'm really sorry. It's really full here already and we could get in trouble if we let you stay. You can stay until Sunday. I'll also ask around for you". I give her a small nod. I'm glad she didn't send me away right away. Since that is usually the case. She doesn't know my whole situation either. Only that things aren't going so well at home. "Thank you for letting me stay at least this week." She sighs. "I really wish I could do more for you". I give her an understanding nod and walk out of the kitchen.

I'm glad I picked up my stuff from my storage yesterday. Otherwise we would never have arrived at school on time. It's kind of weird to think that after six years this is the first day of my senior year here. Which on the one hand I am happy with, but on the other hand I am also having fun here. "Mel, where are you going at the end of the week? ". Emma asks me when we walk into the school. It was quiet on the way here. Emma knows that when I'm deep in thought, leave me alone for a while. I shrug. "I'll find something. Don't worry about me". I hear her sigh. "You know I do. I wish Mrs. Morrison wouldn't be so difficult". I put an arm over her shoulders. "You can't blame her. It's a great fun in your house. I've been happy that she let me stay this week. That gives me time to sort things out. I'll be fine ". We hear the bell ring and that means that the school year has really started again.

I passed the first three lessons half asleep. Advantage of the first day of school. Nothing useful is being done yet. "Good morning Emma". I suddenly get a smile on my face when I hear that voice. "Good morning Mrs van Buren". Emma says to Valerie, who is standing in the doorway of the classroom, when we enter the classroom. "Good morning Lis". I don't look at her, as much as I'd like to. " Good morning ". I say softly as I walk past. I hear her sigh, but I don't respond. I look annoyed at Emma once when I see where she has sat down. Right on the desk Valerie. "Really Em? Couldn't you sit somewhere else". I say sighing. I just shouldn't have told her. " Do not nag like that. Later you will thank me for it". I shake my head and walk on. I take a seat in the back of the classroom. "Mel what is it? ". Emma asks when she sits down next to me. " There is nothing. Just give me a minute." Fortunately, she also remains silent after that and not much later Valerie starts the lesson.

Emma nudges me with her shoulder after a while. " At least look at Valerie once ". I look at Emma. " Why? ". She gives me a small smile. "She is looking for your all the time". I look at the front of the classroom and immediately have eye contact with Valerie. She gives me a small smile, but I can tell it's more of a concern. During class, I try hard to take my eyes off Valerie, but can't stop her catching me staring at her a few times. She then gives me a small smile and continues with the lesson. "That's it for today. The rest of the time you can do whatever you like, as long as you behave yourself ." Great, then I can still sleep for twenty minutes. "I need to get some stuff out of my car. Melissa, would you mind helping me? ". I sigh, there went my good idea. I get up to walk out of the classroom.