𝘴𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘥 𝘣𝘺 𝘺𝘰𝘶. [𝘢 𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘪 𝘢𝘶]

36

I WOKE UP on Saturday morning with a terrible pit in my stomach. The type of pit that makes you want to cuddle up in your bed and stay there. The type of pit that makes you feel like there's a thunderstorm going on inside you.

I then remember it was Saturday, which meant today was Jacks funeral. I had to give the eulogy today. I had to officially say goodbye to my best friend before he gets buried six feet into the ground.

When I realize there was no sunlight peeking through my window, I realized it must've been rainy outside. Perfect weather for an outdoor funeral.

Suddenly, I hear a knock on my bedroom door followed by my mother coming in. "Nini? Are you awake?" She asks in a hushed tone, cautious of if I was still asleep.

She then flips on my light switch, causing me to squint due to the sudden change in light. "Good morning. Big today, huh?" She sits next to me on my bed and placing a comforting hand on my shoulder.

I'm pretty sure she was still mad at me for spending the night at Ricky's house without telling her, but I won't be able to take it if she's mad at me today. I genuinely just need a bunch of support today. That's the only way I'm going to get through the day.

"The service starts in 2 and a half hours, so I figured you should come down and eat some breakfast then start getting ready." She advises. I nod my head and lean it on her shoulder, cuddling into my mom.

"I'm going to miss the first part of it because I'm going to see Dana before I go. I promise though, I'll be there for your speech. So I've asked Gina to drive you, because I don't think you'll be in a good enough state to drive properly." She informs.

I nod my head and get up from my bed, walking over to my window and pulling back the curtains. Just like I predicted, it was raining. I was gonna need an umbrella.

I hear my mom exit my room and closing the door, leaving me alone in my bedroom. I close my curtains, not wanting to look at the cloudy sky. I honestly don't know how today is going to go over. I might not even end up doing the eulogy.

It's days like these, situations like these, where you truly realize how good you had it. Life changes so quickly, one day you could be living your best life with your favorite people, the next you could be completely lost in your own mind.

I'm never getting my old life back. My old happiness and innocence is gone. I guess that's just how life works. Life is like falling down a rabbit hole, and right now I'm falling the fastest I ever have.

♡♡♡

I run the soft bristles of my hair brush through my hair, finish up my appearance for the funeral. I was wearing a simple black sleeveless dress with a black sweater over it, accompanied by black tights and black flats.

"You look beautiful, baby. Like a fallen angel." My mom comments, looking at me through my bedroom mirror. She walks up next to me and kisses my cheek, going on her tippy toes due to the fact that I was a little taller than her. "I'm going to see Dana now. I'll see you at the service."