BLACKHOUSE [H.S.]

Nineteen

"Did you have fun tonight?" Cass asks me softly, her gentle voice snapping me out of my trance.

I swallow harshly. "Yeah, it was good," I nod with a heavy weight in my stomach. I've been keeping so many things from her lately, and I feel terrible about it.

"Are you alright?" She presses, furrowing her brows. Her hand finds its way to my thigh, where she places it gently.

"I'm fine," I respond, forcing a small smile before turning my head to look out the window of the Uber again. "Just tired."

She stays quiet, and I mentally thank her for not pushing it any further.

We're almost to my apartment, finally having left the Halloween party after one in the morning. I tried to convince her to leave right after Harry and I snuck out of the bathroom, but she was drunk and having too much fun with Niall. I couldn't bring myself to force her to leave with me, and I didn't want to get into a stranger's car alone.

She tried to get me to take more shots with her, but I knew that if I did, they would have just come back up out of anxiety.

I mostly kept to myself for the rest of the night, trying to process everything that went down in that bathroom. Harry didn't stay for much longer afterwards, he talked to Louis for a brief moment, and then left without even looking in my direction.

Not that I care, or expected anything more than that. I was sort of grateful, actually. The embarrassment I was feeling after everything definitely would have grown if he tried to interact with me.

I can't explain what the hell came over me tonight, I'm not usually one to hook up with someone at a party. Harry's energy just felt magnetic. He was like a black hole, pulling me in, just for him to destroy me. That's all he's been doing ever since he came into my life.

We finally pull up to my apartment, and I unbuckle my seatbelt before pulling Cass in for a hug.

"Do you want me to come inside with you?" She asks, her eyes flicking between mine with a look of concern. I can tell she knows something's up, I just hope she doesn't know what that something is.

"No, no," I shake my head. "I'll be alright. Text me when you make it home safe, okay?"

She nods hesitantly, and mutters a quiet 'okay' before I get out of the car. I walk quickly to the entrance of the building, and buzz myself in, making my way to my door. Once inside my apartment, I release the heavy breath that I feel like I've been holding in for the last three hours.

I change into a pair of grey sweatpants, and an old Bring Me The Horizon shirt that I'd gotten at Warped Tour in 2013, and I crawl into bed without even bothering to take off my makeup. Not that there's much left after the events of tonight, anyway.

I lay on my back, and stare at the white ceiling above me, just replaying my "moment" with Harry.

I hate him.

God, I hate him. But, I can't deny how much I liked how he made me feel tonight. In a physical sense, of course.

Unsurprisingly, he was a total dick to me right after. He called it a "casual hate-fuck." He's not wrong, but the way he said it and the way he looked at me when he said it made me feel worse than I already did.

I didn't expect his attitude toward me to change in the slightest, it was just a reminder of how fucking stupid the decison was. Even if it was some of the best sex I've had in a long time.

I shake my head in an attempt to clear the thought from my mind. In an effort to distract myself from the self-loathing I'm feeling, I pull out my phone and open Instagram.

The first photo I see when I tap on the icon is one of Louis, Niall, Lucas, Elijah, and, of course, Harry. They're all in their Halloween costumes with big smiles on their faces, aside from Harry, who never seems to smile. He has that smirk that I hate plastered on his face, and his mask in his hand, dangling at his side.

The caption reads: 'Happy Halloween from Blackhouse.'

I tap on the photo, which brings up each of their usernames, my finger hovering over Harry's. I hesitate before pressing it, and my screen switches to his profile. I begin to scroll through all of his pictures, which seem to only be of the tattoos he's done.

There's not a single picture of him on here. It doesn't shock me too much, I know he likes to remain "mysterious," but it is a little weird.

After scrolling through his hundreds of pictures for a minute, and not seeing anything interesting, I sigh and go back to the top of his profile. I don't even know what I'm looking for, but I'm disappointed I didn't find it.

Just as I'm about to back out of his profile, my curiosity gets the better of me, and I decide to search through his tagged photos.

Once again, there are very few photos of him, aside from the one Louis posted tonight and a few others he's tagged him in. It seems like the rest are just more pictures of tattoos he's done that his clients have posted. I'm always surprised to see how good his work is, it's a shame he's such an asshole.

My thumb stops moving when I come across a photo of Harry from August 3rd, 2016. Six years ago. He's standing next to a short girl with bright pink hair. She has her arm around his shoulders, and their heads leaning against one another.

Is he... smiling?

The corners of Harry's mouth are turned upwards, grinning from ear-to-ear, and there's a spark in his eye that I haven't seen before. He looks so young, and happy, they both do. My eyes drift towards the short caption beneath the picture.

Summer days with my favorite person! xx

Is this an ex-girlfriend?

I quickly tap on her username, @carolinecd, and I'm confused to see she only has five photos, the last one being posted only a month after the first one I saw. The other four are just pictures of flowers. My eyes focus again on her name.

Caroline Davies.

I know it's none of my business, but I can't help but wonder who she is. She's very pretty, and I can't shake how happy they look together. It's refreshing to see what Harry looks like with a smile on his face. It's probably something I'll never see again.

I go back to the photo, and I notice something that I didn't before, making my eyes widen slightly.

Harry left a single red heart in the comments.

~~~~~

Holy shit you guys! Thank you so much for 3.9k! I'm seriously in shock! I appreciate every single one of you that have taken the time to read, vote, and comment. I know you've been waiting for this chapter, and it's a short one, but I promise the good stuff is coming up! Thank you again! I love you all so much <3