Taken By Sleep {Joshler} |Completed|

Final Chapter

***Definite last chapter***
(Will be epilogue)

***TRIGGER WARNING, mentions SUICIDE and DEPRESSION.***

Three months later...

I laid on my bed, looking up at the ceiling in the darkness. I was extremely tired from having lost so much sleep lately. No matter what I did, I just couldn't slip into peacefulness.

I'm getting over the death of Josh, very, very, VERY slowly, but surely. It's not even Josh that I'm like this for, it's what happened after.

I was depressed, and that made me think of depressing things, like death, illness, car accidents, pain, heartbreak. Just anything and everything sad.

Then it makes me think that if I were dead, I wouldn't be depressed like this or have to think about any of this. I could just escape from pain and darkness all together. But of course, I wouldn't be able to bring myself to it and have every body else feel this emptiness like me.

I don't talk to many people. It's like how I was when Josh had just died, but worse now. I've stopped eating, sleeping, and caring about myself and others.

My friends and family have noticed. Well, I say friends and really it's just Debbie and Mark sometimes. They keep trying to cheer me up, but fail.

Sometimes I have good days, where I will smile at least once, but other than that, I'm always depressed.

I sighed and shook my head, clearing my thoughts on how I am now. I need to focus on getting better, but it's just so hard. Especially when I'm still not over Josh.
-
Somehow that night, I fell asleep. though when I woke up, the only thing I saw was white. That's when I realized that it wasn't real life, and it was just a dream. I hated dreams.

"Tyler."

I groaned. "No, not this again." I said aloud, knowing that it was Josh who said my name.

"Tyler, turn around, I just need you to listen." Josh said smoothly.

"No, just go away." I demanded, not turning to face him. "Leave me alone."

I felt a hand on my shoulder. And not just thought I felt it, I actually felt him there, like his spirit is here and with me. I slowly turned around, but kept my eyes closed and head down.

"Look at me, please." He said and lifted my head with his hand.

I looked up at him, though I couldn't see clear because of tears welding up in my eyes. But what I could see though, was what I had longed to see again.

His adorable brown eyes, his oh-so-kissable lips, his ever-changing colored hair, his slight stubble that he always had.

"Listen Tyler, I know you miss me. I miss you too, but you can't mourn over me forever." He said, looking straight into my eyes. Mine where now leaking with tears.

"Now I know this is hard, and I know you don't want to, but you have to move on with your life. Crying isn't going to bring me back."

I shook my head. "I don't want to forget about you." My voice cracked and wavered as I spoke.

"I'm not asking you to forget me, I'm asking you to let me go."

I sobbed. I can't let him go, I can't move on, and I can't ever be the same without him.

He pulled me into a hug and I sobbed on his shoulder yet again.

"Don't leave me alone." I whispered.

"I'll always be here, but you have to live without me from now on" Josh said as he pulled back. "Don't let me be in the way of your life."

I hesitated before nodding. I knew that I had to move on, even if it was hard, I just had to do it. There was no changing the past.

He smiled and gave me a lingering kiss on my cheek. He pulled away and gave me one last smile, before I blinked and woke up.

I was looking at my ceiling like I was right before I fell asleep, though it was a little brighter now, meaning that it was morning.

I thought about my dream, and I...I smiled. Josh wasn't gone. He's still with me, even though I can't see him or physically feel him, I know he's in my heart.
_____

Last chapter, but don't leave, there's an epilogue. :) Thanks for staying till the end, I've loved writing this for you all. *kisses you all on the cheek because I love you*