Taken By Sleep {Joshler} |Completed|

Coming Out

Debbie lead me to her room so that we could hang out a little before I left. We had just finished dinner, and I wanted to go, but I knew I should tell Debbie about me and Tyler. I trusted her enough, I just knew that she would be upset.

"Here's my room. You can just sit where ever." Debbie said, sitting on her bed.

I walked over to where she was going and awkwardly sat on the other end. I fidgeted for a few second and then said.

"Debbie I...I need to tell you something."

She looked at me. "Yeah?"

"Um. I need to know if I can trust you. I can't have anyone know about this. Only you...well and Tyler of course but.." I was rambling. I just needed to get on with what I was saying. "Debbie....I'm gay."

She just looked at me. I instantly regretted telling her. I regretted coming. I just regret even talking to her. I was so nervous for what she would do next. When she didn't answer after a few seconds I tried to explain it all to her.

"I'm sorry I had to tell you this way but...oh I don't know I'm terrible at explaining things. Don't take this the wrong way now, you're beautiful, and an awesome person...but I'm just not attracted to you." I said as sweetly as I could.

"Wait, so you're saying that all of this was just you leading me on? This whole time I ment nothing to you and you deside to tell me now? Who do you think you are, just coming to my house and being all nice and friendly and then say that I'm nothing to you?" She said, getting angry.

I stared at her, not able to speak. I was shocked.

"How could you even say that?" I asked her, my mouth still gaping open. "You know what, nevermind. I can't even believe you right now." I said and got up to go.

"Hey you can't just walk away from me like that Josh." Debbie said to me as I was walking towards her bedroom door. I was about to leave when she got in front of me, blocking the door. "I want answers."

I looked down at her and tried my best not to yell in her face. "What do you want me to say? Huh?" I asked her. "I can't change it okay? It's just who I am and I said I was sorry. And what is all this about 'leading you on'? I NEVER said that I liked you more than a friend, nor did I even do anything that would imply that. Just because someone is nice to you doesn't mean they love you Debbie." I stared at her and she looked away and I noticed that she wasn't as tense and before. Her shoulders were slumping a little now.

I walked past her with a light bump to her arm, not wanting to shove her out of the way despite how infuriated I was with her. I walked straight out of the house without saying a word to her parents. I got in my car and slammed the door close.

I drove home in silence, not listening to the radio or drumming on the steering wheel or anything. Just thinking. I was still mad, and I just wanted to punch something. Normally I would just go bang on the drums, but it's nighttime and I don't want to wake anyone up, even though it wasn't even that late.

I got home and went straight up to my room. I opened the door and saw Tyler walking towards the door. I guess he was just leaving.

"Oh hey. I just left my phone charger here and my phones dead so I came to pick it up." Tyler said.

I didn't respond. I just walked past him to my bed and sat down. I didn't want to blow up on him because of Debbie. I guess he noticed that I was upset because he frowned and walked towards me.

"What's wrong?" He said as he sat down beside me. "Did something happen at dinner tonight?"

" No I'm not alright. I shouldn't have told Debbie about me being gay. I shouldn't have gone. She just accused me of "leading her on"." I said. I was getting angry again.