To Love Someone so Dear, Kaveh X Reader

Hidden Pain Chap.9

TW: Lots of Angst and mentions of Suicide In this chapter

After helping Layla finish with the Ancient magical tomes she'd gotten It done in time, she once again asked how to repay you but you simply said that you could be friends In exchange, she was surprised but happily agreed as she hadn't any friends In or outside the palace so you'd be her first. getting to know Layla you discovered that she had issues with sleeping and she was a sleepwalker which made some say that she was cursed, but you didn't believe It as you knew better and that sleep walking was a condition that some had but there wasn't a cure much to her lamenting. It had now been a full month since you'd returned to the palace with all going swimmingly but as of late you hadn't seen Kaveh at all which started to worry you a bit, of course you knew he was the king and was needed all over the place, you still hoped he wasn't pushing himself or anything but you started to have a feeling something was indeed wrong.

It was In the evening, you had gone to have some dinner with the rest of the maids and after serving Kaveh's meal for him Sidra had made an extra batch of Butter Chicken. It had been so long since you'd last eaten the dish so It felt like a real treat this time around, you invited Layla to come eat with you all In which she shared her newest message from the stars 

"you can't really understand them...can you?" asked Mekare 

Layla nodded, "I can only decipher things, but It is like they're speaking to me"

Mekare said underneath her breath, "How strange"

as you listened and ate you soon started to get distracted, your gaze went to the outside as you looked at the beautiful sunset which was there, you then started to wonder about Kaveh again

"(Y/n)? (Y/n) can you hear me"

you snapped out of it, "Hm? I'm sorry"

Layla looked on in concern, "Are you alright? you've been spacing out a lot"

"Oh yes I'm alright"

Mekare gave a nod, "Right...or were you thinking of his Majesty again hm?"

you blushed, "I...no"

Sidra smiled, "Leave her be, she's always been this way when It comes to his Majesty"

you blushed again as you wiped your mouth with the napkin, for the remainder of dinner you remained quiet and afterwards helped to clean up. it soon became completely dark outside with the moon high In the sky It was a half moon tonight, and the stars were all twinkling bright 

you bid your goodnights to everyone before you started to your room in the maids quarters, but you halted your steps as you heard the sounds of glass breaking. In a Fright you spun around as you then started rushing towards the source down the hallway, and you were shocked to hear It again coming from the royal study which made you run faster In great worry for Kaveh 

upon reaching the doors you pushed them open, shocked to see only a decanter on the floor that was shattered and the smell of alchohol as well, Kaveh was stumbling about 

"Kaveh....."

Kaveh slowly turned to see you, he then turned away "I...I...you shouldn't see me like this!"

you put a hand to your chest, "Kaveh what's going on...when did you start drinking?"

Kaveh buried his face In his hands, "Oh Archons...why did It have to be you"

you started walking closer as you saw his face was flushed, he did smell of Alcohol right now but no matter how he told you to leave you went to his side to hold his face in your hands

"Kaveh...when did you start this habit?"

he slurred "It's...It's...all because of my failure as king you know, they're saying Sumeru is doomed because of me"

you furrowed your brows, "What?"

Kaveh started to laugh as he put a hand to his forehead, but then he stumbled which made you do your best to catch him but he knocked you both to the floor "......."

his expression then changed, "do you know...after Father died Mother was never the same...she sent all of the servants away and secluded herself...never smiled but she continued trying to raise me despite her own misery, at night I'd study all night so I could better understand the duties given to me despite being so young I was the king...in these empty gilded halls I was so lonely....but you know what, I fulfilled her wish to leave the kingdom and even gave my blessing for her to remarry"

Kaveh then rested his head against your chest, as he wrapped his arms around you and you felt terrible for him as you embraced him back on the floor. But Kaveh wasn't done just yet 

"You know...father's dying, It's all my fault...I pushed for him to leave and look at what it did"

you shook your head, "That's not true, how could you think that? It was the betterment of relations with Snezhanaya...his late Majesties death It was an accident"

tears gathered In his eyes, "No I killed my father...ruined my mother and now I'm driving the kingdom to it's ruin...(Y/n) do you know how much I'm suffering inside? In recent years I...I thought to go and never return...so that I can see my father and apologize"

"Kaveh...no, don't say such things" 

tears streamed down his cheeks, "I've done my best for this kingdom...I've strained my body and my mind trying to live up to the expectations I've been given but It seems It's not enough, and now look at me drowning my stress and sorrows In Alcohol...I'm a disgrace"

a few tears dripped from your eyes, "It's never been easy for kings but Kaveh...you're not alone, you have all of us here for you...don't listen to the gossip and rumors you're a wonderful king"

you rubbed his back, "As for the Alcohol...I'll help you to quit this habit"

he looked up, "you...you will? you must be a goddess of some sort (Y/n)....really"

Kaveh sat up and cupped your cheeks, "I'm so lucky to have you...I don't know what I'd do without you"

he wiped your tears away with his thumbs, and you did the same for him In return not caring that he reeked of Alcohol at all you embraced each other again.