Anchor [BxB]

Bound pt.2: Giving up

There's that feeling again. Giving up. My mind and my body have taken so much agonizing pain for so long, that it's almost like it completely shut off.

I stopped screaming at every ache and pain.

Sometimes it's like I forget to feel them at all.

That's until he comes to me with compassion, or—they come to me with compassion? So far I know there's 3 of them, but only one seems to care. Doing small gestures like feeding me, bathing me and keeping me clothed. He patches my wounds at the end of everyday and stares at me longingly.

Like he loves me?

But he doesn't love me, this isn't love...

...why are they doing this to me?

Cassian

Im here.

Im still here.

It's been..? A few days? Maybe? I've went from being strung up from the ceiling to chained to the floor. I've looked for every way to escape, I've tried everything but playing their game. I want to, anything to get out of this, but I can't seem to figure out what it is that we're playing.

Their moods swing constantly. Like their fighting one another.

I'm scared. They won't kill me and they definitely aren't going to let me go, so what do they want with me? Why me?

I'm taken out of my thoughts when the door slowly creeks open, revealing A.J.

I hate how my chest starts to hurt when I see him. Not even out of fear. This is pain. This hurts. Someone I once wanted to love for as long as we lived, someone I grew to care about more than myself, one of the sweetest things I've ever known, is someone else. Multiple strangers I never knew.

So vile, so evil and unpredictable.

It hurts that I want him back and that I'll never have that again. It hurts that when he comes through that door I wish he's back to the person I once knew and that he never is.

I want to run to you like I used to. Pull you in and hold you close to me, but instead tears hold your place. Instead of you I pull them in, trap them inside the eyes of mine, those that wish you were back to being mine and only mine not some...

Mastermind. I can never have him again, never in this life or perhaps any other life. Can I?

This hurts. Im hurt.

They walk up to me and grabs me by my arm, not hard enough to hurt me but with enough force to hoist me up off the ground and into his arms, into a hug.

So it's him again.

He holds me close, humming a tune and swaying us slowly to the music. He grips the back of my neck with his right hand and my lower back with his left, folding me ever so slightly in order to expose my neck. I flinch when he leans in and presses soft kisses to the exposed skin. I hate that I love this, that his touch brings comfort, masking the pain he previously caused me. I hate that I love him, and I shouldn't.

"I missed you. They're keeping me away from you, but I always make sure to come see you when Im in front. How are your wounds healing?"

I bite back harsh words and a rude tone. Don't ask me about the wounds you caused even if it wasn't really 'you.'

"They feel fine, the gash on my stomach stopped hurting so bad. The medicine really helped, thank you."

He smiles at me and continues to sway us around gently.