I Wanna Be Yours | Bojan x Käärijä

Part 25

Jere: "Do you know where he went?"

Nace: "No... I just saw him run backstage... but he could not have left because we have the same ride to go back".

Jere's heart started beating fast again. This means that Bojan is definitely still there.

Jere: "I'll keep looking for him.", Jere smiled gently at Nace as a thank you and hurried to continue to look for Bojan, hoping to find him as soon as possible. He wanted to make sure he was okay...

Jere cared so much about him. Even though he felt hurt, crushed, heartbroken, he still wanted to see Bojan happy... even if it meant he had to sacrifice his own happiness.

He walked around, looking in a number of different rooms. But Bojan was not in any of them.

He walked around a bit more, not sure where he was going. He sighed, feeling like he was going to give up... that was until he heard a small weeping sound...

He moved closer to the closed door to a room which he has not looked in yet, so that he could hear better and see if the sound was coming from there.

And it was.

He did not know if it was Bojan who was in there so he slowly and gently opened the door.

It was him.

He spotted him sitting down on the floor, his hair messy and sweaty, the buttons of his shirt open and his hands covering his face. He was sobbing.

Jere's heart broke even more at the sight of Bojan in such a state. He wanted to comfort him, hold him, kiss him... even just sit there next to him... but he remembered the pictures he saw, so he held himself back.

He walked, one slow step at a time, towards Bojan.

Bojan did not notice that someone was there yet. Jere felt hesitant to speak.

Jere: "Maybe I should leave him alone? He doesn't need me...", Jere thought.

Jere: "What am I thinking?! I've been looking for him all this time, I even flew here just to see him! I can't leave now!". It was like Jere was fighting a battle in his head.

One side was pushing him to leave in fear of what answers Bojan would give to his questions, in fear that he would get rejected. He did not want to feel unwanted, especially not by Bojan.

But the other part of him was the opposite. It was desperate for answers, wanting to know the truth. He wanted to know if Bojan still liked him... or not.

Jere started fidgeting but forced himself to open his mouth and say something.

Jere: "B-Bojan?", he said quietly.

Bojan's POV

The moment Bojan heard that sweet voice say his name, his entire body melted. He instantly felt butterflies in his stomach.

He looked up, with his puffy and red eyes.

Bojan: "Jere?"

He saw, even though it was a bit dark, that Jere had a very serious look on his face. And he knew why.

He was to blame and that made him want to cry even more.

He never wanted to hurt him. He promised that he never would, yet he did. He wanted to protect him, to love him, to be Jere's and for Jere to be his... but he ruined it. All because he was careless.

Jere's POV

A tear streamed down Jere's face but he managed to maintain his composure.

Jere: "I think we need to talk..."

They both knew it had to happen at some point. They walked together to go outside. The silence between them made the air thick and suffocating. It was awkward and uncomfortable for both of them.

Jere felt that there was a lot of tension between them... he never thought it would be like this.

It was dark outside. They found a wooden bench to sit on.

They sat there in silence for a few minutes. It was like they were both waiting for the other to start speaking.

Jere could not handle it anymore. The silence was driving him crazy. He already felt like his head was going to explode with questions and the silence made everything a million times worse. He had no choice but to speak. Although he wanted answers, he was still worried about him... he wanted to know how he was... how he has been doing without him...

Jere: *cough* "A-are you... okay?"

Bojan was taken aback. He did not expect Jere to care about how he was feeling... he thought that he was going to scream and shout at him... but he didn't. And this made him feel even more guilty... Jere was so sweet to him yet in return he treated him so badly.

"He deserves so much better than me...", Bojan thought.

Bojan could not make eye contact with Jere.

Bojan: "I...I don't know...", he said, as a few tears rolled down his face.

Jere did not know how to feel with this response. He wished that Bojan would open up to him, just like he used to do.

Jere: "What's going on between us? What happened?"

Bojan felt his heart crack. He knew that such questions were inevitable. He could not avoid them any longer.

Jere: "I saw the photos... and the videos..."

Jere's voice started to crack but he did not want to cry.

Jere: "I... I guess you've... moved on?"

Bojan felt dizzy and sick. He was the one that made Jere feel this way when all he wanted to do was the opposite. He was so angry at himself.

Bojan: "No..."

Jere: "Then what?! What are these photos about then?!?! Please Bojan, explain!", Jere said, while fighting to hold back his tears.

Bojan: "I-... I was just drunk. Some paparazzi followed the band and I in that club and started taking those... they're just rumours Jere, I promise".

Jere wanted to believe him so badly. He really did. But he talked to himself before going to look for Bojan. He determined his worth. He told himself that hearing words like this was not enough. He wanted action.

Jere: "I want to believe you Bojan, I really do. But your words aren't enough".

Bojan frowned. He did not know what else he could say apart from the fact that it was not true, and that the photos and videos of him and the girl meant absolutely nothing.

But then Jere told him what he could do to win him back...

Jere: "It's either you tell the world about us... or we break up..."

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*Guys, I'm still alive. I've just been so so so busy with uni. I didn't think that studying law would mean I would be busy 24/7, I literally wrote this at 3am :')

*Thanks for reading!!! <3 <3 <3