Copyright© [boyxboy]

Chapter 20

Dylan's POV

I woke up and stretched out, my bum rubbing against something that wasn't a pillow. My breath hitched and I turned my head ever so gently to see what the heck was behind me. It was just the super tall guy with the cute slightly curly bedhead. I turned to face him. I sighed slightly, admiring his soft face. Would things last between us? I shouldn't get caught up in even thinking we're a couple, because he's made it clear that I'm just a toy. "I'm just another toy," I whispered, half into the pillow.

I'm a toy to Luke, nothing else. He's admitted to having feelings for me, but what if he was just saying that to keep me around? The same thoughts keep infiltrating my mind, and I'm starting to lean towards the ' get up, get dressed, and run out of here ' side of the mind war. Luke groaned, licking his lips as he opened his eyes.

"Did you say something,?" he asked mid-yawn. My heart thumped hard in my chest for a second and I shook my head.

"Oh, good. Why am I so cold?" He asked, his sleepy voice still in tact.

"We're both naked, duh," I smiled. I kept repeating in my mind that I'm just a toy to him.

He lifted the red duvet and looked down at himself, "So we are. Or, at least I am."

"I am too, we fell asleep before getting dressed after the shower last night."

He scoot closer to me, still laying on his side like I was, "I thought you put your underpants back on?"

I shook my head, "We're late for school, it's already eight."

"Teacher work day, remember?" He yawned.

"Right. Which is why I stayed the night in the first place. But we should get up," I told him.

"But Dyl, it's only eight in the morning and I wanna stay in bed. I normally don't ever sleep in or lay around with someone."

My heart melted when he called me that, and he threw his arm around my waist, "Wanna spoon?"

What? Random. "Uh, sure?" I said, my voice about to crack from how oddly sexy that sounded coming from a guy with sleepy voice. I turned to my other side and he moved so our bodies were touching, and I could tell someone was a bit... excited. I moved my hips farther away from him.

"Agh, don't worry. I won't force you into anything, morning wood sucks though. Maybe one day, when you're ready and completely comfortable with me, and with... us, we can have morning sex. I've never done that, but it sounds cool," he yawned again, "but not this morning. And I know you're still questioning things."
"Questioning? I'm always questioning."
"Why? What about?"
"Just a few seconds ago, you said ' us ', but are we actually an us? Or am I another toy? My mind is always at war with itself, and I know I'm basically a male, being treated like a female toy. I don't know what's in store for me, or for this supposed ' us ' that you mentioned. Like, are we an item, or am I just am item? When we met and you claimed me, I said it was an owned thing, just copyright. The more we hang out, the more I feel stronger about things I think are feelings, but at the same time I don't think are feelings. Is what you feel for me just lust? Is it because I look feminine? Because if that's the case, you easily could've gone and claimed Brandon. I'm just me and I'm nothing special.
"Do you really, truly have feelings for me? I mean I have feelings for you. I like you, but I'm scared that I'm going to actually fall for you, Luke. And if I fall for you, I'm scared that in the process you'll treat me like dirt. You'll find a girl toy, and treat me like a punching bag, basically like what they did," I cringed at memories I didn't want to remember, "and I don't want you to be like them. I don't want to tell you the things in detail about what they did to me, because that'd make you feel disgusted to even know me. I have so many secrets, an such an odd past no one but you and them know about. Of course they know more than you. And I am so terrified that I'm not the one. You're with me because I look girly, in skinny and have a girly structured face, and really the only manly thing about me is my voice, which apparently sounds like the lead singer from Black Veil Brides, but other than that, I don't know anymore. I'm rambling now, and I'm just getting started with what my brain constantly thinks about."
Luke looked at me for a while before putting his thumb on my chin and sadly staring at me, "Dylan... I... Is this really what you think about all the time? Do you really not trust me?"
"It's not that I don't trust you, well... I have major issues. I'm not going into detail, I'm not gonna terrify you, but I'm just beginning to trust you, and that's something I haven't done in a couple years, if not longer. And it's a scary feeling, beginning to put your trust in someone."
"Dyl, hey," his voice wasn't sleepy, but soft and soothing, "don't worry. There... There is a you, and there is a me. I don't do well with relationships, in fact I suck with them altogether. But you make me feel things I haven't felt in so long, and the feelings kinda scare me. Believe me when I say that I know what you feel like when you said you have trust issues. I'm betting my past isn't nearly as bad as yours, but I do happen to have a thing or two that bug me a bit. Dealing with my past. But Dyl, I do have feelings for you. And feminine? Nah, you just squeal an act like a 15-year-old girl who just got her first boyfriend. I'll admit you're adorable, but you're fucking sexy too. And the things you do never seize to amaze me, even this conversation surprised me. But I do love y... your personality, and how odd you are."
I took a deep breath in, "Sorry."
"Why?"
"I probably ruined your morning."
"Not at all... babe."
My heart skipped a beat and I grinned widely, causing Luke to chuckle.
"Do you like when I call you babe?"

"Maybe I do, I dunno," I said shyly.

"Well, babe, I want you to tell me about what happened to you, in your old town. And I promise, actually no, I swear I won't think you to be a freak and I won't run away or never talk to you again. I swear. I just want to know, if you're willing to tell a douche like me."

I looked up at the ceiling, contemplating on if I should or not, "I'll tell you I guess. I don't want to, I don't even want Brandon to know, and he's my best friend. But there's something I want you to do first."

His eyes perked up, "And that would be?"

"I want you to open up to me too. Tell me your reasoning's of the issues you have with trusting people. I'm curious to know, and I really want this ' us ' thing to go both ways. In order  for me to open up, you have to too."