The Way We Fall

Chapter 153 (Roche)

The library was empty save for one person. Roche stood in the doorway, drained emotionally, physically, and mentally. She didn't move, not even when Verita surged to her feet in surprise as the door thudded against the doorframe.

"Roche!" Verita exclaimed. The librarian's eyes were red. "I heard what happened, child. I'm sorry."

Roche had thought she'd cried herself out, but more tears brimmed behind her sore eyes. She sucked in a breath to hold them at bay, distracting herself by looking around the library. "Where's Leinos?" she asked.

"Back in the infirmary. He received a few more patients from the griffin attacks," Verita explained. She raised her brow, "I assume you have questions for him."

"A million," Roche agreed, shifting on her feet. Silence stretched between them, awkward and chafing.

Verita looked down, ashamed. "I'm sorry, Roche. Truly, I am. We should have told you sooner but..."

"I know," Roche swallowed, fighting a wave of emotion that threatened to overwhelm her. "Ikaros... my father... he wasn't who I thought he'd be."

Verita's eyes softened. She crossed the distance between them, clasping Roche's hands warmly. "Tell me everything."

The librarian led Roche back to their chambers, listening patiently as Rochee recounted her entire journey. When she was done, Verita's eyes brimmed with tears, and her papery hands gripped Roche tight enough to cut off circulation. The librarian's brown eyes were far away, glazed with memories.

"Oh, Ikaros," Verita murmured mournfully, "You didn't deserve such an end."

Roche's eyes closed slowly, holding back a fresh tide of pain. "He didn't," she whispered, her voice small. "I wish I knew him sooner. I've spent so many years hating a perfectly good man." Verita's hands tightened around hers.

"You are not to blame. We are the ones who kept the truth from you."

Roche forced a wobbly smile to her lips. "Maybe," she lied, "But I still should have considered the possibility that he might not be the cause for my mother's suffering. I could have just asked my mother."

Verita smiled sadly. "Elena loved Ikaros more deeply than anyone I've ever met. His memory was quite painful for her."

"I could tell," Roche murmured, "It's why I never asked."

"And it's partially why we never told you," Verita confessed, pulling away to wring her hands nervously, "Your mother also asked that we didn't tell you the truth. She feared you would seek him out and lead Romulus' forces right to him. Or worse, Romulus found out about your connection to the whisper and would have you burned."

The reasons made sense, but the words swam around in Roche's mind, yielding to the grief clouding her senses. She sucked in a deep breath, saving the words for a time she'd be ready to hear them.

"What do you think about what he told me about my inkblood?" she asked. The question seemed to startle Verita for an instant, but then the librarian was on her feet, pacing the length of the room as she descended into her mind.

"It'll take some time for you to gain your full abilities. Years, perhaps. Leinos walled in your inkblood completely, and your father merely widened the hole you made when you first received your inkblood. He's merely hastened the process of your inkblood leaking back into your body." Verita explained, tilting her head thoughtfully, "I suppose Leinos would be able to tell you more. He'd be able to use his inkblood to sense your returning strength."

"How long would that take him to sense?" Roche asked, rocking forward on her heels.

"Perhaps a few days."