At least i'm trying- Taylor Swift story

08

10.11.2023
Wednesday

Alexa's pov

I've been doing online classes since the second week of living in the states, because i decided that joining a high school mid year during my senior year is not worth the stress. I have online lessons from 9am to 3pm, and it's pretty nice because we don't even have to be on camera everyday, they just want to to show your face once or twice a week.

I don't like needing or asking for help because it makes me feel stupid, so whenever i have difficulty with a task , i try to figure it out but it's frustrating and hard.

I already had to get Tina to help me with my math assignment over FaceTime because i was beginning to panic any time i even thought about it, and knew that she likes and understands math, even though i don't know how that's possible.

I'm struggling with writing my english essay right now, because even though I'm pretty good at speaking and vocabulary and tenses, I'm absolutely horrible at writing stuff. I've been trying to start this essay for a week, but i still got nothing.

Once i get going, i can usually just add enough words for the essay to get a decent grade, but it's the starting that's the biggest problem. My mind goes completely blank, and i've failed multiple writing tests in both polish and english, just because it took me so long to figure out a way to write the beginning paragraph.

So here i am now, crying at the kitchen table. Thank God that no one is, or is supposed to be home for the next three hours, because i don't want them to see me like this.

I suddenly heard my phone ring. I saw that it's taylor calling, so i picked it up.

"Hey Lex, how are you doing" she says.

"Hey Tay, everything is going okay, i'm just bored right now " i say, hoping that she doesn't suspect anything. She is REALLY good at sensing when i'm upset.

Without a word, i get a FaceTime request.

"Answer the FaceTime request Lexie" she said leaving no room for argument.

I did as i was told, because i couldn't win that argument even if i tried. I saw her worried expression at seeing my puffy, red and teary eyes.

"What happened sweetie?" she asked.

"Nothing, i just can't can't write a stupid fucking english essay and i don't know what to do anymore" i said starting to cry again.

"Hey, it's okay lex i can help you, why didn't you say anything?" she responded.

"You have way better things to do than helping a dumb, worthless and pathetic seventeen year old write an essay" i said defensively.

"Okay, one: you're none of those things, two: I care about you and three: pack your stuff, i'm picking you up and we're going to write an essay at my house." she stated and hung up, leaving me no chance to respond.

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Taylor helped me write the essay, walking me through all the steps and explaining them all. The essay got an A+.

She also talked to me about how i deserve help and how i'm not dumb or pathetic and that i shouldn't think that low of myself.

She pretty much keeps doing everything i've ever wanted my mother to do, and now i'm actually convinced that there's nothing she can't do.

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This is short even for me, but i just came up with it and decided to post it so i can post two pretty heavy chapters that i just need to read over tomorrow.

As always, thank you for reading and take care of yourselves :)