(Third Person POV)
The priest, Father Julius, walks up to the cathedral and knocks on the doors in that coded rhythm.
"Excuse me, sir," a young voice with a British accent says, and he turns around and sees a beggar girl wearing a shawl. "Could you spare a piece of chocolate for a starvin' orphan?"
"I'm sorry, my child, I don't have any on me," Julius apologizes.
"Oh," the girl replies.
Julius turns back to face the doors when some monks open them—and surreptitiously pops a piece of chocolate in his mouth.
"Then have some acacia mints," the girl whispers as she simultaneously slips a handful of the said mints into Julius's pocket. "Yes!"
The girl leaves, and it turns out the girl is Noodle in disguise. Meanwhile, at the zoo, the zoo security guard known as Basil Bond eyes another "Big Night Out" chocolate which has been delivered with a note.
"'To Basil Bond, Employee of the Week!'" he reads the note. "Well, that's lovely."
He puts the chocolate in his mouth, and passes out almost immediately. (Y/n), Willy, and Abacus approach the zoo security lodge, and Willy reaches inside to pull a lever that opens the gates while Abacus reaches inside to grab a ring of keys. They ride out of the zoo in a tall, rickety transport van, with Abigail in the back. Abacus is driving the van, (Y/n) is sitting in the passenger's seat beside him, and Willy is in the back, tending to Abigail.
"Everything alright back there?" (Y/n) asks Willy.
"Everything's fine," Willy assures her. "Isn't it, Abigail?"
Abigail snorts in response. (Y/n) and Abacus notice that they are approaching a low bridge.
"Tell her she might want to duck," Abacus calls back to Willy.
"Tell her she might want to what?" Willy asks.
"DUCK!!" (Y/n) and Abacus yell at the same time.
Abigail notices the bridge and quickly ducks just as the van scrapes under the bridge. Abacus parks the van in a deserted alley. In the cathedral, Julius stands by the great doors, addressing the assembled monks.
"Good morning, brethren," he greets them.
"Good morning, Father," they greet back.
"Now as you all know, it's Baron von Schmeichelhammer's funeral today and his widow is a bit of a pious type, so I don't want to see anyone eating chocolate during the service," Julius explains.
"Yes, Father," the monks reply.
"We all know that one day we should be judged for our sins, but it's not going to be today," Julius tells them.
"Amen," the monks say.
Julius turns as two monks open the doors. He steps outside—and freezes in his tracks when he sees Abigail standing there. Abigail then catches a whiff of the acacia mints, and realizes the smell is coming from Julius's pocket. She starts walking toward him.
"There, there. Nice giraffe," Julius tries to coax her as he backs away from her.
He charges into the cathedral, closely followed by Abigail.
"RUN! Everybody out! Save yourselves! Judgment has come in a most unexpected form! Run away!" he shouts.
The monks flee in a panic while Julius runs up the steps into the pulpit and grabs a telephone beneath the lectern.
"What have I done to deserve this? You know what you've done, Julius! You sold your soul for thirty pieces of chocolate!" he scolds himself as he frantically starts to make a call.
Lottie takes the call from the cathedral.
"Hello, Operator. How may I direct your call?" she asks.
"I need the zoo! It's an emergency!" Julius responds, completely panicked.
"Putting you through to the escaped animal department now," Lottie says as she connects the call.
However, instead of connecting the call to the zoo, she connects it to a phone booth in the alley that Willy, (Y/n), Noodle, Abacus, Piper, Larry, and Lottie are in, and Larry takes the call.
"Hello, zoo?" Larry asks.
The rest of the group starts making various animal noises to make it sound like they are in a zoo.
"Quiet down, you animals. You too, octopus!" Larry says, making it sound like he's underwater when he tells the "octopus" to shut up. "What? Oh, yeah, I think we did lose a giraffe. Okay, jeez, I'll send the guys around!"
Larry hangs up, and signals his friends that it worked. Julius hangs up—then hears breathing behind him. He turns, and he yelps when he sees Abigail behind him. He runs away, but not before Abigail bites down on his pocket, tearing it and spilling the acacia mints, and he flees as Abigail munches happily on the mints.
"Oh, forgive me! I'm a sinner! A weak and wicked chocoholic!" Julius shouts as he runs to the doors.
He makes it through the doors, looking distinctly disheveled, and two monks close the doors behind him. He then sees an entire congregation of mourners, including Baroness von Schmeichelhammer, and pallbearers with a coffin.
"Good morning, everyone!" he greets them. "Welcome to St. Benedict's. Baroness, I'm so sorry for your loss. We're just having a few technical difficulties, um, so you might want to pop the late Baron down for a minute. . . Ah! The cavalry!"
The zoo van has indeed arrived in front of the cathedral, with Abacus driving and Piper in the passenger seat.
"Are you the cleric who called about a giraffe?" Abacus asks Julius.
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Man, Rowan Atkinson is so funny, even as a bad guy! What's your favorite movie/series he's acted in?
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