Look at me ~ Childe x reader ~

Chapter 34 ~ Proper confession~

I look up to the direction the voice came from. Just great what type of street have I stumbled upon.

I don't reply to the man, he takes that as his cue to walk closer towards me.

My heart started pounding as I saw he wasn't walking away, I instinctively reached for my pocket to grab my phone. After feeling around in my pocket I was reminded that I had nothing on me.

I was completely defenceless, I did not even have anything to fight him off with not even the apartment keys.

The guy soon realises this and a small smirk starts to spread across his face, my breath started to get unready and I was staring to panic.

Is this actually the end for me, as I thought that I decided to take a final attempt and turned around to run.

But the man leaped forward and grabbed my arm keeping me in place, I was trapped, his arms on both sides of the rock fence closing me in.

"Hey if you don't struggle it will be easier," he whispers leaning closer into my ear.

Really? Is this my punishment? If that's the case should I just accept it ? I closed my eyes heart still feeling like it's going to jump out. And decided to accept my fate.

No one knows where I am, I have no way of finding help if this is the end I should just accept it.

I felt the guys hand travelling up my waist as more tears slid down my eyes, maybe I don't deserve to be saved, I thought as I felt one of his hands travel down to my thigh.

Even though I was trying to calm myself I was still sobbing frantically I guess I'm selfish to the core.

Before anything more can happen, I suddenly feel the presence in-front of me disappear, I open my eyes to see the guy on the floor holding his face, it was bleeding slightly.

I looked to the direction he was looking at to see a very angry Childe, it was an expression I had never seen from him before. He was slightly out of breath, he looked like he had ran around before reaching here.

Even though he was panting slightly to catch his breath the menacing look in his face was just as effective, the random man got up to run.

Childe leant forward, grabbing him by his collar and punching him repeatedly.

"Do you enjoy touching what's not yours?" He says through his teeth as he looks at the man with an emotionless expression.

Childe did not give the man a chance to respond; instead, he kept on beating the perpetrator with his fist, moving his entire body and making sure I could hear every hit.

His breathing became erratic as he applied more force to each blow; before long, I could hear the blood being squelched with every blow. The man was close to unconsciousness and had long since given up on resisting.

I rush forward and grab Childe's arms just as he is about to go in for another punch

"Please," I say quietly still feeling emotionally overtaken by everything that has just happened as I sob.

As he lets go of the guy's collar, I feel his body soften.
Then he looks directly at me.

He lifted the hand that was not covered in blood and placed it on the back of my head pulling me into his chest. I respond by grabbing his clothes and continuing to sob in his chest.

"Shhhhhh, I'm here now" he whispered as I felt him kiss the top of my forehead.

"Childe, I- I" I couldn't get my words out, nor did I know what I wanted to say, there was so many things that needed to be addressed and I was genuinely overwhelmed by it all.

"Why didn't you have your phone y/n," he says in a slightly annoyed tone

"I-I didn't know I was going to end up far," I say sniffling as I look up at him.

"Do you know how hard it was to find you?" He says getting antsy.

"I-I'm sorry," I say looking at him apologetically

"That's not the point y/n, if I hadn't found you in time," he stops himself as he clenches his jaw. I don't say anything.

"Why don't you do anything right" he whispers, I'm sure I wasn't meant to hear it but I did. And that got on my nerves.

"Well I'm sorry I can't live up to your standards," I say rubbing my eyes and looking at him annoyed.

He deeply sighs.

"No y/n I'm not doing this again," he says poking his tongue through his cheek.

"Oh? But you're the one who started it, are you not?" I say now feeling anger take over.

"And I also apologise for the mistake I made of kissing you back in the jacuzzi, because quite frankly that's what lead to this whole scenario," I shout at him, he didn't reply but kept the same expression on his face.

"And all of this for what? Because you 'like me' sure, I don't ever know what you feel, one minute so ignore me the next you act like it's all okay." I continue to speak my feelings as they've been bottled up for a while.

"I told you I liked you already, what more do you want?" He says calmly with a hint of annoyance.

"Pft okay, can we just go back?" I say giving up with trying to get anything out of him.

I start walking to the direction he came from when I feel him grab my arm.

"Y/n, wait" he says as he sighs.

I attempt to yank my arm back but he tightens his grip.

"I said, wait" he says now more sternly.

"And I don't want to," I reply still attempting to free myself from his grip.

"Do you enjoy being this difficult?" He says now loosing his patience.

"So you think this is me being difficult?" I say as I scoff and roll my eyes

"I hate you so much Childe, so much that I cannot even put it into words, you are so self centred and-" I get cut off from my rant with a tight hug from Childe, my eyes widen slightly at the words I hear from his mouth.

"I love you y/n, I really do" he whispers desperately in my ear.

"I-" he cuts me off

"No, just shut up and listen," he says whilst still hugging me tightly.

"I realised today how much I truly love you, how much I kept lying to myself about the what I feel, when you weren't picking up your calls, when I couldn't find you anywhere, when I realised you were missing in a country you don't know your way around and when I saw you here," he pauses as he pulls back looking down at me he puts his hand gently on my face, his eyes gleaming due to the light of the lamp post.

"You're difficult and stubborn but the feeling I feel when I imagine the disappearance of your presence makes my heart ache, I love you Y/n and I'm not joking," he says as he leans his head on my shoulder

"Thank god you're safe," he whispers.

I don't respond to what he says not knowing what to say to that, is this really what he's really been feeling all this time?

I was taken aback and had so many mixed emotions, but I felt warm, it was a feeling of happiness mixed with guilt.

Am I allowed to feel this way?