A Heart For A Heart

The Nightmare Begins Part 1

Alexandra's Point Of View:

I rubbed my head having woken up to problems. A headache accompanied me as I helped Merlin clean up Morgana's room. Gwen swore she blew the candle out when she brought the ward extra blankets due to dropping temperatures. Morgana's magic was getting out of hand. My potion worked half of the time. Her magic was stronger than most potions I could even brew. The ward was becoming a threat to the kingdom and herself. Merlin and Gaius were just as aware as I was. The King observed the burnt curtains from the suspicious relit candle. The window was shattered open. Arthur blamed the lightning that struck the castle. I blamed the lady's uncontrolled magic. Uther believed the only other explanation was that someone snuck into the ward's chambers and deliberately started the fire. I returned to the physician's chambers to find Morgana wrapped in a blanket. Gaius was comforting her. I sat across from my friend offering a sympathetic smile.

"May I speak with Alexandra alone?" She requested hinting for Gaius to leave the room.

He nodded eyeing me early, "Of course, my lady." We sat in silence until we heard his footsteps down the hall.

"It was me," she paused beginning to shake, "I set the room alight. I started the fire."

I knew I could not openly tell her she had magic. I wasn't quite sure she was ready as well as the impact it would have. "Did you knock the candle over?"

"You and I both know that's not what happened," she stared deep into my eyes, "I did it, just by staring at it. The flames suddenly leaped higher. It was me. It was magic." My breath hitched in my throat. Magic wasn't a safe word to say around here let alone admit you are a user of it. Rubbing my temples, I tried to think of an appropriate response. I reached for her hand and held it in my own.

"Magic is not to be feared. If you believe you have magic, then you must accept that it is a part of you. Once you accept it, it may torment you less," I said giving her hand a reassuring squeeze.

"So my nightmares and the accident from last night... it was all my magic."

"It could be, but you are the only one who can control that internal battle, Morgana." I hugged her unsure if her knowing she has magic is the wisest thing.

"So the remedy is not in the vial, but in my mind?"

"Exactly, if you can practice to control it, then it won't have power over you."

She wrapped me into another hug, "You're a good friend, Alex."

"I try my best, but this must stay between us. If you have a problem, then come to me and we'll find a solution. We are in a kingdom where the mention of magic is outlawed."

"Why would you take the chance to help me?"

"Like you said I'm a good friend," I sheepishly smiled. The truth to her question was because I too, have magic. "I can stay with you for the next few nights to get this fear under control."

"You've done so much already."

I had decided to do some research in Gaius's books while Gwen watched over the ward for the rest of the day. If Morgana's power is triggered by her fear, then we would have to get her not to be so afraid of whatever she faces. The pages were filled with remedies, but nothing for helping one overcome a fear or mental state. After I barely touched my dinner, I made my way to the lady's chambers. She had welcomed me happy not to spend the night alone. Her maidservant offered to stay, but Morgana told the woman I had it covered. Guinevere went to leave, but I stopped her reminding her to take the candle out of the room entirely. She complied and left the two of us sitting on the bed.

"Now, Morgana. Your magic seems to be triggered by your fear. My guess is the lightning scared you causing your magic to act out." she nodded listening to the wisdom spilling out from my mouth. "I will be right here with you, whenever you get scared because of a noise or anything just squeeze my head to release the tension."

"Okay, so I need to not get as scared."

"Yes, remember you are stronger than your fears," I encouraged. I could tell she felt a little more confident as she attempted to sleep. Her body stirred alert for anything. "Don't be so alert. I am here. I will protect you. Just focus on sleeping. Close your eyes and listen to the rise and fall of your chest," I ordered trying my best to handle the unfamiliar situation I was in. My nightmares haven't returned in a while. My last scare involved the great dragon and fire spreading throughout Camelot leaving Merlin dead alongside Arthur. I threw up that morning at the gruesome images in my mind. I traced tiny circles on her back and tiredly smiled triumphantly as I heard her light snores. My body's sleepiness distracted me from my mission. It was not long before I too was counting sheep. My body jolted out of the wooden chair at the sound of glass angrily shattering. It was the vase that her maidservant placed Merlin's flowers in. Morgana had told me that she appreciated my brother more than a friend. I didn't realize they were as close as she made it seem. She claimed that he had been doing his best to comfort her through these hard times. She wept and seemed to having the symptoms of a panic attack. I held her close to my chest whispering that everything was going to be okay. "This is our first attempt at this. You're okay. You're safe," I repeated until her tears dried up and her breath slowed to a normal pace.

The rest of the kingdom was now awake and Guinevere offered to take the dayshift with Morgana. I encouraged them to take a trip to the castle gardens and just soak in the beauty of nature. When I had the moment, I reported to Gaius all of my thoughts and experiments. He warned me that I should not get involved. I told him that I would not stand by as the woman suffers to sleep shaking afraid of everything. I just couldn't do that to anyone, especially not my Morgana. My limbs grew stiff from the lack of sleep and the horrible chair. As my eyes fluttered close, Merlin informed me that he planned to contact the Druids for help. Disagreeing, I told him I had it covered. However, the silence led to a quiet sleep. Again, my bones rattled as I was awake unpeacefully by the warning bells. Rushing toward the main area of the physician's chambers, I saw Merlin.

"What happened?" I spat out.

Gaius had returned and looked angry, "Uther thinks she has been kidnapped." By the way, he said it, I could tell that wasn't true. Merlin had told her where to find the Druids pretending that Gaius ordered him to deliver a sleep draught last night.

"You sent her to the Forest of Ascetir by herself to seek the Druids who may not even help her. What if she doesn't make it there? Why couldn't you let me handle it?" I exclaimed darted back into my room to change. I was going after Morgana. Outside of Camelot was not a safe space for the King's ward.

"Everything I learned from being here of magic and what is good and right, I learned from Gaius. If it wasn't for you as my sister who understands and my trusty mentor, I would be lost like she is now," Merlin defended.

"I know you meant well. But if what the Great Dragon told you is true about the extent of her powers, then we should have tried to control the situation ourselves." My small bag was packed and now I had to try to leave the castle grounds undetected.