Good Cop Gone Bad ~ Rewritten

41| il funerale

•Aria Marino•

           I straightened my hair, as I tried to do my makeup, tears kept streaming down my face and I stopped trying. I finally had a father figure who cared, who showed he loved me. But it didn't last long.
           Not only that, but I know Matteo loved his father dearly. I know he is very upset but he hates showing it, I've tried to get him to open up a bit more about it but he just won't. I don't want to pry so I am trying to be patient and he will open up when he needs it.
           My black dress ended way below my knees, my small black heels were the first thing I pulled out of the shoe closet and I decided that they were good enough.
           I look over to Matteo, my eyes taking in his form. His hair looking messy, his shirt still unbuttoned, his tie in his hand.
          I walk up to him, taking the tie from his hands. I smile softly at him, beginning to tie it for him. Once I finish, I pull him down and stand on the tips of my toes to kiss him on the cheek.
           I smooth his hair out, combing through it with my fingers. "Are you ready to go?" I ask softly, my hand leading down his arm and to his hand, taking it in mine.
          He nods, hugging me tightly. I embrace it, hugging him back before we both let go. I kiss his cheek once more before we walk out hand in hand.
We go down to the limo, the rest of the family in there already.
The entire drive, I could only focus on the passing city, everything else was too surreal.
           I couldn't believe Papà is gone.
           As we walk towards the church, I just took in my surroundings. Matteo looks so solemn, stoic, but sad. I rub my thumb back and forth on his hand the entire time.
           We got to see Papà in his casket, both me and mamma started crying.
           We all lay a white rose on his casket before they lower it into the ground, but we left before they did. We couldn't watch it.
           The reception afterwards was not much better. I did not know people even did receptions after funerals. But people talked, consoled mamma, it was so hard watching her go through this.
           She has loved this man for over half her life. For over half of her life, Papà has taken care of her, she has taken care of him, they have loved each other, they have raised kids together, and now she had to watch him fade away from her. It was horrible to watch.
           I have been with mamma this entire week mostly. She sits down in the same spot that they had breakfast every morning alone now and cries. But she refuses to leave that spot, it's where they had breakfast together every morning they were home for over thirty years.
           Arriving home, I head to the kitchen as Matteo had mentioned he was feeling hungry in the car. However, just as I was about to serve the food on a plate, he walks into the kitchen and I see this look on his face that I swear I have never seen before.
          It's weird how good I am at reading him, his expressions, the way he feels. But this look, I could just barely tell what it was.
          "Melodia, I think I am going to.." he began, but he trailed off, his hand running through his hair. I could see his breathing was picking up as his chest rose and fell.
          I took his hand, pulling him to the living room without saying a word. I sit him down on the main couch, sitting on his lap and holding him in a hug until I heard a sob. He was finally letting it out.
          I held him as he cried and wiped his tears with my thumbs. His cheeks were so warm, his eyes so red.
           It was weird seeing him like this, he had never been like this, but I love that he felt like he could tell me how he felt. He came to me. After all the times he has held me and made me feel better, I could now do it for him.
           He cried and sobbed until he couldn't anymore. He cried until he could barely breathe, his nose was even bleeding, but I held him the entire way through and that was all that mattered.

•••••

bye bye

~ elle 🌸