If you're done it doesn't mean I'm done too(Steve Rogers/Captain America fanfic)

Chapter 71

Sarah's p.o.v.

I was getting more and more bored with every minute I spent home. I missed my work and badly wanted to see the new SHIELD's HQ. Of course I understood that I won't be allowed to go back to field and knowing Steve, he wouldn't even let me train for a few weeks. Just paperwork and research. But that would be great anyway to get out of these four walls and do something more productive than lying on my couch and eating.
It was Tuesday's noon and so far I had organised my closet and cabinets in my bathroom.
"Fuck it," I muttered and grabbed a pair of light blue jeans, white tank top and brown, oversized sweatshirt.
I quickly braided my hair in a french braid and applied a bit of concealer on my face. I decided to go to the store. There were few things I needed to buy and a walk seemed nice. It didn't seem too cold outside. I took my wallet, phone, put on my boots and leather jacket. Once again I checked myself in a mirror and went out, locking the door behind me.
The fresh autumn's air filled my lungs and swept few stray strands of my light brown hair in my face. I went down the street enjoying the weather, which wasn't too cold, the minimal wind and sparse clouds. After a while I noticed clouds getting darker and thicker. I rolled my eyes and crossed the streen to reach the grocery store. I took the cart and went down the aisles puttings bread, cereals, 'Pop Tarts' and other groceries and things in it. As I was waiting in the line, my phone went off and I fished it out of my jeans pocket.
"Yes," with a bright smile I picked up.
"Oh, thank God. Where are you?" Steve sighed in relief.
"In the grocery store. What's wrong?" I frowned, taking stuff out of the cart.
"I just came back earlier and wanted to surpsise you, but you weren't at home and I just freaked out. Sorry," for some reasons he sounded irritated.
"It's fine. I'll be home soon," I rolled my eyes.
"Okay, bye," and he hung up before I could respond.
I frowned once again, trying to figure out why Steve could be upset but not to avail. I paid for my purchases, put them in a shopping bag and went back to my apartment. A while ago I gave him the spare key of my apartment so he could come to me anytime. It could have been early in the moring when he came back from a mission and wanted to crash at my place or when I was going to return from a mission and he waited me with a dinner and cuddles. There have been even times when we don't see each other for a week because of how we've been working.
After fifteen minutes walk, I was back home. Going up the stairs, I unzipped my jacket. I unlocked the door and went straight to the kitchen to put down the shopping bag. Steve was sitting at the table with his back to the door, hunched over a newspaper and a plate.
"Hi," I said, putting the bag on counter and quickly took off my jacket.
"Hi," he grumbled not even looking up at me.
I sighed and kissed the top of his head before ruffling his soft hair. I went back to the corridor to hung up my jacket and take off my boots. The silence between us was awkward and I didn't want to make things worse, asking questions. I decided to wait till he is ready to talk with me without pressure.
"Do you want tea?" I quietly said, putting food in the cabinets and fridge.
"Yeah," Steve turned the page.
I put on the kettle, took two mugs and put tea bags in them. While the water was boiling, I made two peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, cutting them in half diagonally. I poured the water in the mugs and placed one in front of him with a plate of sandwich, kissing the top of his head as sign that I'm there for him, then took mine and went to the living room, placing the my favourite mug on the coffee table before going to change back in a pair of sweatpants and hoodie, and going back, turning on the TV. I curled in the corner with a blanket draped over me and a pillow behind my back.
After a while when I had finished eating, I heard a scraping of a chair on the floor, clinging of dishes as they were placed in the sink and a heavy footfall. Steve came in the living room, looking like a lost puppy and with a deep sigh he came to me. I lifted up a corner of the blanket, sliding lower on the couch. He laid down between my legs, resting his head on my chest and wrapping his arms around my torso. I put the blanket back on us and wrapped my arm around his shoulders, with other hand stroking his soft hair.
"We messed up," Steve quietly said.
"What happened?" I kissed the top of his head.
Then he started to tell about how things turned. Mostly it all happened because of the incomplete information. They were forced to call for backup team to deal with these HYDRA's agents, because no one knew how much they were there and the casualties from SHIELD's agents.
"I had to go and tell his family that he's dead. His wife has a three months old baby girl and now she'll have to grow up without a father. He died right next to me and there was nothing I could to save him," Steve sobbed, his body shaking uncontrollably.
"I'm so sorry," I whispered in his hair, rubbing his back.
Few tears rolled down my face and I hugged him tighter. He shifted and now his face was buried in the crook of my neck, his weight still pressing me in the cushions. I pulled the blanket higher up to his shoulders and wrapped my arms around his torso under the blanket, drawing paterns on his back with my fingers, whispering sweet nothings in his ear till we both fell asleep.

-----------A/N-----------

As sad as it is, but school is gonna start again soon. Well, I have two more weeks, but still. That means I'll have some kind of schedule and updates should be more frequent than now, when I mostly write on my days off, which is today by the way.
I'm still not ready for the photos of 'Civil War' set. I'm still not over the fact that few weeks ago mum and her boyfriend laughed about my love for 'Marvel'.
Love, Undi ❤