As Time Passed By (A Josh And Maya Fanfic)

As Time Passed By: Chapter Thirty-One

A/N: Thank you so much for getting me to 1K votes!! It really means a lot. I'm sorry I haven't been able to post anything for the past few weeks. I was busy with exams and project and all that stupid stuff. Any Filipino student reading this will understand that August is hell month.

[UN-EDITED]
*****

"Riley? Farkle? You there?" I say as I hear a knock on my door. I rise from my seat at the corner of my room.

I had run straight home after the incident. But before I had run, I caught a glimpse of the window at Topanga's. Riley, Farkle and Lucas had seen the entire scene.

I swings the door open to find them all there. "We're here." Riley says.

"Thank you." I say clutching her in my embrace.

"What is it? What's wrong?" She asks, but before I respond, I walk over to the food of my bed and sit on the floor leaning on the bed. Riley sits beside me and the two boys sit in front of me.

"I remember everything." I say as tears streamed down my face. I had known that the old me had a very strong infatuation with Josh. Everyone had told me so. But this? What is this? Why does it feel like someone's stabbing my heart over and over again? How come no one warned me about this? Did they know?

"Maya." Riley says embracing me.

Farkle sits beside me and I lean my head in his shoulder. "For once... let us be the ones to protect you."

"It just hurts so much..." I say clutching my heart.

"Do you know why it hurts?" Riley says. I keep silent. I've never known why it hurts. For a long time, I've been able to feel numb towards this pain. But after forgetting, it's coming over me like a tidal wave.

"Because it's real." Farkle says.

"Because he matters to you." Lucas adds.

"Because deep down in that heart of yours, no matter how many locks you placed there..." Riley points to where my heart is. "You loved him and you still love him."

"Is this all that's love about?!? Pain?!" I burst out loud and start sobbing. Please make it stop.

Riley shook her head. "No. Love is seeing the ray of light through all that pain."

It took me a while before I finally even my breathing. And by then, I felt really tired. "Hey guys." I say my voice barely above a whisper. "I'm glad you're here." I smile, despite the pain. Because I am glad they're here. My rays of light.
******

It's been three days since you-know-what, and that leaves me with four more days until we have to leave for Paris.

I was busying myself with packing when I heard a knock on my door. I walk over and open it but only slightly - my room's a complete mess and I'm currently packing my underwear. So you get the point. Anyway, it was Angela at the door. "Hey, Maya."

"Angela. What brings you here?" I say opening the door so she could come in.

"You haven't been leaving your room much these couple of days." She walks over to my bed and takes a seat at whatever little space there was. "And you've been really down. Thought you might need someone to listen."

I take a seat on my bed next to her, not caring if I squished any clothes. "Thanks Angela." I say. She scans my room and something catches her eye on top of my study table. It was brimming with stuff, yes, but an old tattered notebook stood out among the sea of colors.

"Hey, mind if I take a look at that?" She says motioning to the notebook. I nod my head and she walks over to grab it. "You know Shawn had one of these back in college and they were filled with amazing poems."