The other Swan

Toxic kisses

We drove in silence, I was trying to be strong. I think Jake realised, and kept quiet so I could concentrate on willing away the tears.

I tried to focus on other things, like what was going through his mind. He loved Bella, and She got hit, I survived. Did he wish I had traded places with her? That I was the dead one.

We drove past the park me and Bella had played on as kids. She use to be such a chicken, never wanting to get muddy, swinging on the play set with Jakes sisters, while me and Jake and his brothers rolled around in the dirt chucking a basket ball.

Then as we got older, Bella use to always sit with me,  under the oak tree.

“Bella, I don’t understand. Why did he dump me.” I sobbed tears pouring down my cheeks.

She wrapped her arms around me, “Let me tell you something, Lily. You are too good for him, you are beautiful and if he can’t see it he doesn’t deserve you.” She squeezed my knee.

She always was all knowing , giving the best advice.

It hit me as we drove past, that I may never, have her opinion and leading advice again.

I could, possibly be on my own.

With no mum, no sister.

Who would be my maid of honour?

Who would stuff their faces full of chocolate and other break up foods with me?

Who would put up with all my mood swings, and bad habits and still love me?

If Bella left, it was just me and Charlie.

And ultimately he was always at work.

So I was alone.

Without Bella, I was on my own.

I burst into tears and hugged my knees, Crying and shaking as I rocked back and forth.

Jake looked over at me, swerved onto the kerb he stopped the car.

Got out of his seat, and closed the door.

Don’t leave me I thought. Starting to cry harder.

Then my door opened, and I was lifted up, and onto his knees.

He wrapped his arms tightly around me and sat down, closing the door he leant on it.

Kissing my head.

“Promise me, Tell me everything will be okay.” I whispered, between sobs.

His hold tightened but he didn’t say anything.

“Please, I don’t care if you are lying. Just Please, Please tell me it will be alright.”

Jake shook his head, and I felt, a drop of warmth hit my shoulder. He was crying.

“Lily, I want to tell you, I want to make it better to stop you hurting. But I promised myself, never break a promise, again.”

I squished my head into his chest. Sobbing.

“Then, then tell me you don’t wish it was me; tell me you don’t wish it was me instead of Bella.”

Jakes hold around me loosened, I bit my lip, he did wish it on me, I was broken.

“Lily, Lily how could you even say that? Of course I don’t,  I never would, Lily, If it had been you, I would have pushed Edward out of the way, I would done CPR myself, and would have ripped Rowers head off, before I left with you, in the ambulance. Holding your hand the whole way telling you how much I loved you. I wouldn’t leave your side.” Then he really was crying, silently but I could feel him shaking.

“Lily I would never wish you dead.”

I looked up at him, and for the moment, I forgot about Bella.

I turned so he wasn’t holding me, so I had straddled over him in the seat.

“Jacob, I love you.” And with full force, I finally for the first time, let myself kiss him.

JACOBS VIEW..

She had turned in her sitting, to face me.

“I love you Jacob.” And before I could say I love you back.

She was kissing me a Kiss that I had never felt, as our lips touched invisible bonds, began to wind themselves around us, pulling us in, making us one.

The kiss was the most beautiful thing I had ever felt and I never wanted to let go.

Lily, My Lily. She was mine, she always would be.

But why, why had it taken so long, why had it taken a kiss?

It was supposed to happen the instant you laid eyes on each other.

Her venom, her venom must have somehow effected the process.

I was the luckiest wolf alive, the girl I imprinted on, killed vampires, just like we did.

Only she did it with her intoxicating blood.

“Lily.” I whispered. “Did you feel that?”

She was looked at me dazzled, bewildered and nodded.

“Lily, I imprinted on you, it’s you Lily.”

Her jaw dropped as I pulled her into me once more.