Fate (Niall Horan - Completed)

THIRTY ONE

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"Here's another blanket." Ethan puts another blanket over my freezing body. The four that are already on me clearly don't help. Neither does heating up my apartment. While I'm under the many blankets, Ethan sits on my desk chair with sweat pants and a tank top on. It must be very hot for him since he chose to wear a tank top instead of his usual T-shirt. I told him that he can leave anytime, but he wants to stay in the room - what a good brother, I think and smile. My apartment is probably a sauna but I don't feel any warm feeling. It's just cold for me and the five blankets don't do shit, except mashing me.

"They won't help." I tell Ethan and put all the blankets to the side. I get out of my bed and take clothes out. "You can leave now, I'm taking a shower and... thanks." I smile at him and get into the bathroom. A feeling tells me that he'll stay.

Under the hot shower, my body temperature doesn't change but at least it relaxes me and my mind. I still have Niall crying in the middle of the street right in front of my eyes every time I close them. Maybe I should have gone back and forgive him. Maybe I shouldn't have danced with Adam. Maybe I should have demanded his reason to go out clubbing with that girl, even before last night could happen. If I did, maybe we would have gone clubbing. Maybe I would have been the girl next to him.

But then again, it isn't my fault completely... right? He chose to lie tome, to go out with her and not me. He hurt me first, so I hurt him by dancing and having fun with Adam.

Right now, it all doesn't matter to me anymore. Not after last night. He had real tears as well as I did. We both got hurt and we both waisted tears that could have been avoided if we did things differently.

All I want right now is him and a good reason. All I want right now is to forgive him. All I want right now is Niall to warm me up after cold days.

If I could build a rocket, I would. If I could fly away and forget the last week, I would. If I could go back to Niall and mine first official date, I would. It was perfect and I wish I could relive it over and over again.

I get out of the shower and get dressed in the pair of sweatpants and the shirt from Niall. I was completely unaware that I took exactly that out of my clothes, but it's fine and as the fabric hits my skin, it warms up a bit. I breath in his scent and smile at the thought of him. I brush my hair and then hear a door open and close. Either Ethan left or someone just came in. Secretly I hope that it's Niall.

This week took all my energy, I had my finals and then the stress with Niall. I'm exhausted. But I love Niall too much to let this week ruin us. I know that he feels the same.

I get out of the bathroom and praise my mind for knowing that Niall just came in. I look at his weak, appearance and his face which glows up when he sees me. He smiles and I smile back but only weakly.

"I'll let you guys alone." Ethan, who I forgot was also here, gives me a smile and leaves my apartment. I wait for Niall to say something as the door closes, but he remains silent, probably trying to get his thoughts straight. He sits on the edge of my bed and looks at me like he's lost. I go over to my bed and sit down right in the middle. Niall stands up and runs his fingers through his hair. He's about to say something, I know that, and I interrupt him.

"Just start already, please." My voice is sharp and sounds angry, even though I'm not angry... all I am right now is weak and hurt. We both know, the longer he waits, he more it may get out of control. That's what we both want to avoid.

"I don't know where to start." He admits and looks down to his feet.

"At the begging." I suggest. My words are as cold as my body. He hears it too and looks me deep into the eyes. I look away before I can get lost.