20. Funeral

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I looked in the mirror and stared. My black dress was floaty and kind of long. I put on a black hat with a covering on it. It covered half of my face and the tears that fell. Today was his funeral.

My aunt walked in holding Nala. I smiled at her and carefully took her into my arms. She squirmed a little then kept drinking her bottle. "Are you okay?" My aunt asked. She isn't going today because she's watching Nala.

I shrugged as an answer and kept feeding the baby. Her small body pulsed with each swallow. When she finished she went right to sleep. I passed her back to my aunt and she kissed my cheek. It was time for me to go to the church. I drove with an absent mind. My head was starting to hurt as I muffled my cries. I never thought the day to bury my father would come so soon. When I got to the church everyone who needed to be there was there already. I parked in one of the reserved spots close by the door. I grabbed some tissues and wiped my eyes. My eyes only filled with more tears and I laid my head on the steering wheel as I cried more.

Suddenly my car door opened. Danny sat in the passengers side and didn't say anything. "I know I can't say anything to make it better but I'm sorry for your loss." He said. I nodded a thank you and he brushed my shoulder and then I knew Danny had come to get me. I blew my nose and prepared.

He walked over to my door and opened it. He held my hand as I got out. He walked me to the church door and I stopped. "Where is Cardo?" I asked.

"Already in there. You okay to go look at his body?" He answered and asked.

I nodded and put my black shades on. I spotted Cardo first and he saw me too. I looked at him pleading. He got right up and met me in the aisle with Danny. The Pugh's of the church were filled with fancy dressed people. He probably worked with them in his short time being here. Then I saw my dad's best friend from Connecticut in the first row. He was crying with his wife sitting next to him. He was there for my dad when my mom died and now he was sitting at his funeral.

I held onto Danny and Cardo tighter as we got to the casket and looked away. We sat on the second to the first row. I couldn't even look at his body when we passed. I sat quietly and didn't move. My mind went to other places as I sat there.

Back to when my daddy was alive. When he cried with me over mom. When he promised everything would be okay. When he picked me up when I fell off my bike at 7. By the time I snapped out of all my memories everyone was standing ready to leave. My eyes poured over and I began to cry again.

Danny and Ray tried to make me get up but I swatted their hands away. They didn't make anymore attempts until everyone was out of the church. "Come on Lena. We gotta go." Ray pleaded.

I shook my head no.

"Lena please?" Carlos asked rubbing my back.

I shook my head no again and they tried to make me stand again. I screamed and cried again. It came out of nowhere. The memories overflowing. The sight of his body not full of life anymore. I sobbed wildly as everyone remaining left the church. My chest heaved and I pulled my glasses and hat off. I sat there alone in the church for what felt like hours.

I stopped crying and sniffling but I still sat there. Leg bouncing and heart racing. I felt someone sit next to me and I knew who it was but I felt so helpless. Everything happened so fast.

"Are you okay?" Cardo spoke clearing his throat.

I shook my head no and looked at him. "Why did it have to be him?" My voice was cracked.

"I don't know Lena but he wouldn't want you beating yourself up over it. He would want you to be happy and continue being his ballerina princess." What he said was true but I didn't wanna hear. I got up then and tried stomping away. He followed and snatched my car keys from me. I turned around and tried to get them back but it wasn't happening. "I'm driving." He stated. I turned back around and kept walking out the church. I got in the car and threw my hat and shades in the back seat. He got in shortly after and cranked the car right up.

He drove but not to my house. He drove to his. We got out and I noticed we are the only ones here. I felt a flash back of when the other mansion blew up just down the street. Sarah had caused all that pain to kill me and my dad. I followed behind Cardo as he unlocked the front door. I stepped in and looked around. It was nice in here. Really nice. Cardo grabbed my hand and we went up the stairs. Then into the master bedroom where he pulled his shirt out of his pants and undid his tie.

I just stood there with my hands folded. I stood close by the door. He turned around and beckoned for me to come closer with his fingers. I followed suit and he pulled me closer to his body. Our bodies were touching and he held me tightly. "I'm sorry." He apologized. I just melted in his arms. "I'm so sorry Lena."

I hugged him to me without another word. I got tired of standing and let go of him. Unzipping my dress I let it fall to the floor. I turned and hopped in his bed going straight to the middle. He took off his pants and shirt and got in with me. He nestled his head at my stomach and held my thighs tightly with both arms wrapped around. He planted soft kisses on my navel. Every word he spoke was backed up with kisses.

I eventually had to push away before things got carried away. He didn't stop though and I soon realized what he wanted. And he wanted it now. "Cardo." I said sternly. He answered with a mumble while trailing wet kisses down my body. "I don't think this is a good idea."

"You don't want me to take the pain away for a minute?" He asked stopping his trail. He looked me in the eyes piercing me. "I'll make you feel good." He said. Then he continued back up my legs with his kisses. "Can I do that?"

"Yes." I breath out.

He slipped his finger tips in the sides of my underwear. He pulled down slowly and the soft fabric caressed me. When all of my clothes were successfully off Cardo gently pushed one of my legs up to my shoulder. I was stretched and more exposed to his every desire. I felt the air attack my wetness but the heat overpowered eventually. Cardo sat there admiring my pink flesh for a few minutes.

He slowly leaned in closer as if examining me. His eyes squinted and that's when he dove in. Head first. I couldn't watch him any longer pull at my pearl with his teeth gently. He pulled and pulled continuing to suck on the throbbing wrinkle anyway. I tried to drag my body away but he only followed and then I was hanging off of his bed. My hair fell out of the bun it was in.

Cardo held my legs tighter so I couldn't run anymore. It seemed that it got even more intense as I was laying upside down. Soon my center tightened and I just knew I was going to come. But he stopped.

He dragged me back on the bed and laid me on the pillows. I wish he would hurry up because I still held onto my orgasm. A few more strokes of his tongue and I would be fine. Maybe all he had to do was touch it. Just once. He hovered over me and he looked a little nervous.

"Are you sure about this?." He asked nervously. I looked at him curiously but then I knew exactly what he was talking about. "I'm scared you'll regret me."

"I love you, Ricardo."

"You promise?" he asked me and I felt him get right at my center.

"With all my heart." I said grabbing his face and making him kiss me.

He pulled a condom from his draw and opened it with his teeth. He took his boxers off and that's when I saw it whole. It was thick and long. I looked up at him with wide eyes. He unclipped my bra and kissed my neck. We laid there completely naked. He hovered over me and I felt his head right at my entrance.

"It's gone hurt." He told me and I just nodded. He pushed inside stretching me out and I whimpered. I had never felt anything but his fingers inside and that felt good. This felt like hell and torture. Cardo kissed my lips and closed his eyes as he dug more into my body. "Don't do that."

"I'm not doing anything." I cried.

"Don't tense up or it's gone hurt more. I'm being as gentle as I can, I'm gonna start moving now." 

"Okay," I said out of breath. I haven't moved but I was sweating.

He grinded in me with perfection but it felt like drilling. I tried to move but it hurt worse anyways. Soon Cardo's breath hitched and his body relaxed. I was happy for it. I wanted this monster out of me. And to think I wanted children.

"You okay?" He asked.

"Yeah. I'm glad you have my virginity."

"Thank you baby. I love you."

"I love you too." I spoke truthfully then we went to sleep.

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