He doesn't want me

Chapter 45-Choking

"What are you doing here?" Cameron asked during lunch Raven snickered and i elbowed him on the ribs "ScaredyPUP" he said emphasizing the word pup

I glared at him "Will you shut up?!" I said through gritted teeth

"Where is the heat house?" Dreydon asked Alpha Xavier playfully Alpha Xavier pretended to consider the question for a while before answering "Classified" He said with a wink

After class I was walking towards Raven's car when I saw Alpha Xavier throwing a punch to Raven's jaw I started to run towards them as Raven pushed Alpha Xavier off roughly

They're at it again...

"Raven!" I called grabbing the back of his shirt he stopped trying to punch Alpha Xavier and looked at me "What is it with with you today?" I asked him

"Did you know what this fucker told me?" Raven asked pointing his finger at Alpha Xavier his eyes a swirling color of coal

"He said that we might as well get together now because us following him and Jenna like dogs are getting too fucking pathetic!" Raven exclaimed my lips quivered and traitorous tears streamed down my eyes I quickly wiped them off

"I can't believe you said that" I told Alpha Xavier whose expression remained stony Raven grabbed my arm to take me to the car but I escaped from his grasped

I walked towards Alpha Xavier grabbing his hand I pressed a handkerchief to his palms "You're bleeding" I told him looking at his busted lips

Without another word I turned away from him and ran to the car as Raven drove away as fast as the car would go

When the school was too far to reach out sight the car suddenly stopped in the middle of the road I looked at Raven who rested his head against the chair his eyes closed

"It's true we are fucking pathetic, trying so hard to make them notice us, doing everything just to make them happy even if it's a fucking silver bullet to the heart" he said eyes still closed

"You're not pathetic" I said reaching up to touch his nose "You're bleeding" I said showing him my bloody finger and he smiled slowly opening his eyes

"I always am" he said in a tone so bitter but sincere that it made me cry again

Raven and I did what we do best...play call of duty "A sniper behind you!" He exclaimed I pressed in a command thst made my soldier throw in a grenade

It exploded and blew the covers of other snipers and bullets ricocheted down on us

I was lucky to survive having ducked under a broken car Raven...not so much "A grenade to kill one sniper..one sniper!" Raven said I wrinkled my nose at him

"Sore loser!" I shouted out to him sticking out my tongue he glared at me his nose flaring as he slowly walked to me my eyes widened

I quickly got off the couch and ran up the stairs going in his room closing the door and hiding under the covers

"Scaredypup did you honestly thought that I won't have keys to my own room?" He asked I froze under the cover and shrieked when I felt the blankets tighten around me

"Rave stop!" I yelled as he bundle me into the blancket caging me I felt myself being raised up "Oh Crackers!" I yelled again as he swing me back and forth

He dropped me in the floor in surprise as a loud knock rang from the front door I shoved the blanket off me and tried to catch my breath rubbing my forearm that I unfortunately  landed on

"It hurts" I groaned out glaring at Rave who just chuckled slapping the back of my head as he went down the stairs to open the door

I went down the stairs grumbling angrily my mouth opened agape when I saw Alpha Xavier standing on the doorway his eyes unusually dark his back tense

"Just what exactly were the two of you doing?" Xavier asked in a leveled but edged tone "You sure you want to know?" Raven mocked

Alpha Xavier's eyes flashed dangerously "Video games" I answered giving Raven a warning glance "and so much more" he said with a wink

I covered his mouth with my hand blood rushing to my face "Very mature" I told Raven with an eye roll

I felt a hand curled on my arm dragging me away from the house shtting the door at Raven's face Alpha Xavier pushed me against a tree on the edge of the woods

"We weren't doing anyth-" I started to explain but he held up his hand to stop me "Save it. I don't care" he said in a straight face I clamped my mouth shut

"Do whatever you want with whomever you want. I don't fucking care... just not with Raven" he said I opened my mouth to ask why but he continued,

"It will hurt Jenna" he said and I closed my eyes and pressed the back of my head against the tree wishing that it was a dagger digging down my head ending this painful endless bane

Of course it's Jenna it's always Jenna in everything he do it will always be Jenna

I slowly slipped down to the moist soil hugging my knees to my chest breaking down in front of him "Why do you hate me so much?" I asked feeling tears slipping down my cheeks
He sat his eyes leveling with mine "What is it?" I asked "is it the way I talk?Is it something I did? The way I dress?" I asked "I can change" I offered half pleading

He shook his head "I don't hate you...I just" he sighed before continuing "Don't want you" he said 

I looked at his eyes trying...praying to find a hint of lie in his words but I know just by seeing the stony set of his eyes that what he said is his truth

Truth doesn't hurt...its heart breaking

His eyes softened "I'm sorry but I can't lie" he said standing up curling his hands in my arms raising up with him "I wanted to apologize for what I said earlier I don't mean-" he started

"Yes you do" I said he closed his mouth not wanting to lie "You're wrong I'm not following you around" I said "I'm groveling " I added wiping tears opening the door to go back in

He stilled for a while a look of pity in his eyes "Then stop" he said and I smiled bitterly "I can't make myself to" I said hopelessly

"Neither can I" he said looking st the picture of Jenna on the coffee table I smiled at him through my tears

"Then I guess I'll choke" I said remembering what he said about the thread of love tied in each of our necks

His eyes glinted with understanding but he said nothing taking that as a good bye I started to close the door before remembering...

"I forgive you" I said smilling at him he nodded I closed the door and walked towards the coffee table where Jenna's picture is placed

It was taken in the front lawn of this house she was smilling widely the sun giving her hair a fiery look her eyes moss green just like the trees behind her

She looked so happy while I felt so sad and that made me so angry I wanted to hurl the picture to the wall but instead I reached out to brush dust off of the edge of the wooden frame