Chapter Twenty Nine : The Truth and Lies of Nikhil Taware...

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Still I couldn't dare to say things to her directly. Maybe she'll read over here and the decision will be her's. Well it's long time we both have suffered a lot. 4 years ain't less time to go through all the troubles that we have faced. The first time when I met her I thought of getting close to her, maybe during that time I had crush on some other but she was always there on my mind. I still remember when I had dance with her during a cousin's wedding long back. She was very sweet and innocent type and probably she is even now. Well she know's how angry I become if anything happens to her or someone says anything to her. Probably at aunty's place one of her cousin talked with her in bad language and it made me so crazy that I beat him untill he bleed from his nose and mouth. I couldn't hear anything wrong about you.


The day I was going to propose her I thought why should I ask her something which was impossible. Yes, I knew, I knew that this relation was going to be impossible for both of us and we will have to suffer a lot ahead and that's what we are doing now. We had to take necessary steps if we wanted to make this possible but I couldn't let her know. I was already in problem. In my 10th standard I was not at home for couple of days, I shouldn't have gone that day but still people trusted me and believed in me that I was a good person at heart. The thing that actually made her close to me was the way to react to situations. I had solution for every problem she would bring to me, whether it was for her Computer Science notes that she needed after the prelims or anything, her life was perfect and I didn't want her to know what all was I suffering and didn't want her to be a part of it. Even though I thought of getting a life with her I should have said things to her but no matter how hard I tried I couldn't. That was the reason why I used to ignore to talk with her on the phone calls or to meet her every time. I could control my self to say things to her. Even if she would have listened to these things that time still I think situations would have been the same. Maybe mother had to take some steps after my father's death due to which she was an outcast for all of our relatives. Whenever I used to go for holidays the way people treated me was hell. I was safe only with my granny, my grandfather, my aunty from Mumbai and my other aunty, who later also became a part of other people who criticized me due to my mother and father. Still I kept going. I never told mother how people behaved with me cause if I do she'll not bear it and maybe something may happen to her. I've already made her suffer a lot due to my behaviour I don't want to let her suffer more. Yes I'm kind of guy who would keep everything by myself and will suffer alone besides telling anyone. During my 12th standard my mother and step dad used to fight always. I couldn't bear that and still mother wanted to live with that person. Maybe he helped mother during her hard times but the sacrifices that she had made she didn't deserve that was happening to her. I used to walk out of house at morning 4.00 am and return at 9.00 pm after the gym class. My prelims, 12th Boards, AIEEE, CET exam was hell of time for me and that's when she came in my life. Talking with her had became a part of my life. Every time when we used to call or meet, maybe during Titanic I thought of telling her to help me to over come with the problems that I was having. I needed to get my mother's reputation back in the family and all of the relatives. People's decision do get sometimes wrong but that doesn't make them a bad person, the situation makes them behave bad. I know how my mother has raised me, she always said that there is only one thing true, that is "respect". You respect people they will respect you in return. If you Choose something never leave it till the end and stick with your decision. People will try to get you down but never get demotivated. I still continue to do the same thing. Maybe people call me psycho but I'm way worse than that. Yes I'm selfish, too much. Being single kid of my mother I was given everything that I wanted and due to which whatever is mine is mine. Maybe at a moment I was wrong. After the Hyatt party on the day of Makar Sankrant she decided to stay away form me forever saying she likes someone else. I knew as I was talking to her as "D" and she did express that she started liking him. Maybe she didn't knew it was me talking or she wanted me to get away from her. On Makar Sankrat we met at "D"place but I couldn't get her convinced. That was the first time when I tired Wine. Yeah the same one which we were going to have during the Mumbai trip. After drinking I don't know why "D" said this thing to his so called brother, "That let this semester get over every week I'll sleep with different girl." I got scared a lot. I know even if I'm drunk I listen to things carefully. That night I talked to her and told her about the girl whom "D" had told me. She cleared her backlog paper. I can't express how happy I was about it. She called Shri and told him her result, that day he was with me but he had some work. Shri and her were going to meet at Dagdushet she invited him but he didn't go. I was going to go but couldn't go I should have gone. That day I was so happy that finally she will be able to appear for interviews. She had some problem so I gave her some exercises to follow and a diet plan.

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