I'm Screaming I love You So (Tayley)

Pain is just a compromise

Chapter 1:

Hayley's POV:

About a week had gone by since the last time I hung out with Taylor. I took this time to fully understand my feelings towards the situation. I kept in touch with all my loved ones including my parents, sisters, friends, and boyfriend Chad. Who was currently in LA. I couldn't wait to visit him. But I knew that he was so busy with his own music that it was best at the moment to stay home and figure out my own problems and learn how to deal. Today, we were having a meeting with Adam about our upcoming South American Tour. It was the first shows without Josh and Zac so my anxiety level was through the roof. 

I arrived at the office building and to my surprise, I was early. I went straight in and even Adam was surprised. I sat on the couch chatting up with Adam until Jeremy walked in. "Hey little one" he said as I stood up to greet him with a hug. "Hey Jerm" I said as we embraced each other. "Where's Taylor?" he asked looking around. I shrugged. We both sat on the couch until once again the door opened up and in walked in Taylor. He seemed a bit happier than usual. We stood up to greet each other and even had a bit of a group hug. 

"You got it all figured out right?" Adam asked us as he was once again repeating the information for the upcoming tour making sure we all got it. All three of us nodded and with that Adam had another meeting to attend. We took off from the office and decided to catch up and eat some well-deserved lunch. We ended up at a barbeque joint on Main Street. No surprise there, we all love barbeque.

Once we all had devoured our plates, Jeremy looked at us with a serious yet joyful face on. "So guys, I wanted you to hear this from me." What’s up man?" Taylor asked with a slight smirk. "I'm getting married!" He exclaimed happily as Taylor and I both smiled widely quickly walking over to him and creating yet another group hug. "How, when, where, oh gosh." The question escaped both Taylor's and I's mouth as he went into detail. "Congrats man," we both said in unison. 

Taylor's POV:

My best friend is getting married. How exciting is that. I was laying on my couch flickering through the channels when something caught my eye. A car was pulling up into my drive way. I couldn't tell who the car belonged to but once the knock at my door came, I quickly got up to reveal a devastated Hayley. 

"What's wrong?" was the first thing that I could think of saying. She wouldn’t look up so i grasped her arm lightly and pulled her in for a hug. Taking a step back, with Hayley still in my arms, i closed the door behind us making my way towards the couch. I sat down and brought her to my side. I reached over her lap and turned off the TV, letting her know that she had my undivided attention. I called her name but she just looked at the ground, still keeping both arms wrapped around my mid-section tightly. 

About ten minutes went by and all I could do was slightly rub her arm and kiss her head letting her know that I was there for her, Just in case she wanted to talk or not. I will always be there for her. Finally she looked up at me and I could tell she was holding back tears. I rub her cheek with my index finger and she let out a deep sight. "Ready to talk?" She nodded. "I...I think...me and Chad are over." I was shocked to hear those words. They have been together for so long now. "Why would you think that?" She just looked down at her feet once again. "You don't have to tell me.." She cut me off by speaking, it was like she wasn't even aware of her surroundings she was so focused on her feet and the rest of the world was shut down. "He..he.. called me to let me know that with his music and my music, our relationship isn't healthy...." She continued to tell me all the exact words that were said in their conversation. "But that doesn't mean its over." I said hopeful I couldn't even begin to imagine what it must be like to have someone so close to your heart and just watch as they slip out of your fingers and not be able to get a grip of them. I could not imagine my life without my girlfriend. 

Gabby and I had been together for almost two years now and I couldn't begin to imagine the heart ache Hayley must be feeling. "It is over Tay," she said suddenly pulling me out of my thoughts, "I've know it was over for a while now, I love him so much, but i can't keep fooling myself anymore. We weren't meant to be. The sooner I accept that the less heart breaking all this will be for me." I saw her slowly wipe away a tear. It hurt me seeing my best friend in pain. Not only did we lose bandmates, but now she lost her partner. 

"Oh Hayles,"  I said slowly pulling her head down to rest on my chest. "Your heartbeat is so soothing." She said with a tearful giggle. "It beats for only you." I said chuckling and getting a bigger laugh out of her. "Thank you." she said after about five minutes of just sitting there with the sound of our breaths being the only ones to fill the room. "For?" I asked as she pulled away sitting up straight and turning to face me. "Being you," she said with a smile playfully smacking my arm. I smiled at her as she got up to leave. "Call me later?'" I asked as she was walking towards her car. She gave me thumbs up indicating that I will be expecting a call from her. 

Hayley's POV:

What am I doing up? I thought as I took a glance at my phone. It was just about to be 8am. Oh shit, Taylor I promised i would call. I quickly dialed his number not bothering to get out of bed. "Hello" a female voice answered the phone. Gabby it was Gabby. "Hey Gabby good morning, is Taylor around?" "He's still sleeping, you want me to wake him?" "No, let him sleep, just tell him to call me later please?" She agreed and I said my farewells. 

I was lying in bed watching 'I Love Lucy' when I heard my ringtone. I sighed, pressing the mute button and answering the phone. "Are you dead?" I heard Taylor's voice come across the other line. I laughed as well as he did. "Why on earth would you think that?" I asked as I could not stop giggling. "Because Gabby said you called in the am, you aren't one to wake up so early so I figured it must be your soul calling." I could not stop laughing. I laughed so hard my stomach was beginning to hurt. We talked on the phone for a few until I had to get up and use the bathroom, meanwhile we decided to get some lunch. Taylor called Jeremy but he had plans with Kat. 

"Now that is what I call good food." Taylor said as he took another big bite of his waffles. I laughed as he had a bit of whip cream on his lips. I didn't think twice and used my finger to wipe it off and licking it off my own finger. I immediate felt how awkward that must have seemed so I apologized. "It's ok, seriously, stop." He said after about the seventh apology. "It's just that I used to do that to Chad all the time." Images of him popped into my head, all the good times, the bad, and last night. Taylor seemed to notice my expression that went from happy to sad in a nanosecond. "Hayles, you will get through this, you're a though chick." He said giving me a sympathy smile. "I know..Its...it’s just that it all seems like a dream." He nodded fully understanding what I meant. I forced a sad smile. I couldn't cry again, I wanted to, but i guess my tears dried up.

"Do you remember how hard it was to get over Josh?" he asked suddenly. Just hearing his name made my heart sink. I nodded. He smiled at me and right there, it hit me, "if i did it once, I can do it again." He nodded at me, placing his hand over mine. And like that, I felt a spark rush through my whole body. I looked up to see his face, did he feel that too? "See pain is just a compromise," he said with a smile. I forced a smile back ignoring what I had just felt seconds before.