Black Rose (Draco Malfoy)

Private Lessons

Chapter 43: Private Lessons

I slept in on Monday and missed breakfast. It was alright because I had a free period and I doubted I would have been able to eat much anyway. Someone, I survived another lesson of Defense Against the Dark Arts. Not long ago, I would have been thrilled at the chance to practice defensive magic in class, but for some reason, my enthusiasm for fighting and rebelling seemed to have all but disappeared. Perhaps Dumbledore was right; maybe I needed something stable to keep me focused.

I lingered after class that day, figuring that was the best mode of proceeding. "Are you coming?" Hermione asked as she slipped her bag strap over her shoulder.

I shook my head. "I've got to talk to Snape. I'll catch you later."

Hermione smiled slightly. "Oh, ok. Good luck."

I nodded at her and watched her leave. Soon, it became apparent that I was the only one left behind in the room.

"Miss Hansen," Snape said from his spot at the front of the classroom, "is there something I can help you with?"

"Yes," I said. "Actually, there is." I paused before continuing in order to collect my thoughts. "Last year, you said would help me with my Potions studies. You said something about extra lessons..."

"Miss Hansen," Snape said, "Professor Slughorn is your Potions Master now, so perhaps you should speak to him on this subject."

My eyes widened. "But Professor Dumbledore told me to talk to you!"

Snape raised his eyebrows, appearing interested. "Did he, now? And how did this topic come about?"

I faltered. "I – I wasn't feeling well- I'm still not – and I needed someone to talk to, so Hermione suggested-" I took in a shaky breath; I could feel myself beginning to tremble again. I placed my hands on the table in front of me and leaned on it for support. "I'm going through a lot right now, and Professor Dumbledore thought it might help if I focus on something – like Potions. He said you could help me. He said you wouldn't mind. And I don't know Professor Slughorn that well, and I really need some stability in my life right now." I cut off and swallowed a lump in my throat. Was I making any sense?

"I see," Snape said, betraying no emotion. "Very well. I will instruct you in advanced Potions, if you are up to it."

"Yes," I said, brightening instantly. "Thank you, professor."

Snape nodded slightly. "Come by my office at seven Thursday, and make sure to bring everything required for Potions class."

I was not exactly sure why, but I felt a great sense of relief watch over me. "I will. Thank you again." I picked up my bag and turned to leave.

"Oh, and Miss Hansen?"

I looked back at him.

"Did you ever get a chance to speak to Mr. Malfoy?"

My face fell. Why did he have to bring that up? "Yes," I mumbled.

"Is something wrong?"

I stared at him, wishing I could read into his mind and decipher his motives. "Everything is wrong," I said. Then I turned and walked out of the room without another word.

***

I was not sure how I managed to survive until Thursday. My homework was actually very helpful. It was something I could focus on and get lost in. It distracted my mind from wandering to other thoughts. As long as I was busy, the pain did not feel as bad. It was hard to concentrate in my classes I shared with Draco, of course, but I was trying.