Your eyes

Chapter 29

*warning: slight cursing*

Taehyung's POV
  
      After what happened with Jimin, nothing felt right anymore. My mind became overwhelmed with thoughts that only managed make this whole situation worse. I began to realize how I really feel.

     The more I thought about it, the more it made sense to me, even if I didn't want it to. My relationship with Jimin wasn't all unicorns and rainbows, not at all. With everyone else, Jimin is kind, sweet, caring, he's admirable. I love that part about him. But for some reason, when he's alone just with me as my boyfriend, he's different.

     I always feel as if I am somehow upsetting him with everything I do. He doesn't smile around me anymore like he used to, he gets angry easily, and if I'm honest, that scares me. I can't help but think that it's my fault he's become so... Temperamental lately, but I don't know how to fix it. Now... Now I don't think I can fix it.

     All I wanted to do was to be alone, but with one sick twist of fate, suddenly Jungkook appeared. I really didn't want to see him, not because I don't like him, but because I think I do, and in a way that I shouldn't.

     I know that something within me has been changing recently, but it isn't until today that I fully understand just what it is. I think about Jungkook so often that it gives me headaches. Whenever I'm alone, I just want him near me, I want to talk to him, I want to feel his presence. More so than my own boyfriend.

     My mind had been spinning in circles, comparing and contrasting the two best friends. I just wanted to think alone, but clearly it seemed Jungkook had no intention in leaving.

     I just couldn't sit still, adrenaline making me restless. A heavy sadness weighed within my chest, when the answer finally came to me. I can't deny it anymore, I like Jungkook.

     I just can't imagine my life without him anymore.

     Even knowing this, the fact Jungkook had kissed me still floated in my mind, and I only became more and more confused. I wanted to ask him why he did it, but by the time I opened my mouth, I couldn't close it. I rambled unintentionally, the emotion rising in my chest as I questioned Jungkook. I just want answers.

     Jimin's face popped up in my mind and I sighed, everything becoming too much. Now, being as overwhelmed as I am, my stupid, naive mouth opened and spoke the last thing that I wanted anyone to hear.

     "Why do I like you?"

      A heavy silence blankets over us, my own voice echoing in my ears.

     What did I just say?

     A tight pressure constricts my chest, and I can't breathe. I close my mouth slowly, my eyes wide as the crucial meaning of what I had just said gradually sinks in. I can only stare at Jungkook, his large, somber eyes staring back at me. His lack of response unnerves me, the surprise slowly emerging in the light of his irises.

     I begin to panic, understanding that this means confrontation.

     Why did I say that?

     Why did I have to make everything so much more complicated?

     Jungkook probably doesn't even like me, and I'm currently in risk of losing my boyfriend, so why the hell did I open my mouth?

     Shame washes over me, and I can practically feel my ears burning. We remain in stalemate, trying to figure each other out with simply our gazes until Jungkook's mouth opens.