Your eyes

Chapter 33

Jungkook's POV

     "Don't you dare come closer, Jeon Jungkook."

     Heavy, nauseating guilt squirms in my stomach, and although I should listen to my hyung, I don't. My legs move robotically, my mind so fervently determined that I can't stop moving even if I wanted to. I'm here to explain everything and make it all okay again. I don't know if Jimin will ever forgive me, and he has every right not to, but I want him to at least understand.

     I want him to comprehend why this happened, and that Taehyung and I never meant to hurt him at all. I want him to know that I'm still here for him as his best friend, even if he doesn't want me near him anymore. If my explanation can at least help lessen his pain even a little bit, then I'm more than willing to at least try.

    "Hyung..." I whisper softly as I approach him, my body jittery with adrenaline. I had run here as soon as the thought of this place appeared in my mind. Now that I'm here, the words that I want to say are stuck in my throat, and no matter how hard I try, I can't recall them.

     A sense of fear flows within my veins, but I try to ignore it. I shouldn't be scared. This is my best friend, and if he doesn't accept me, that's fine. I'm not going to stop supporting him either way.

     "I-I mean it Jungkook. Go away." Jimin growls, his small form pushed up against a tree. Despite his attempt to seem intimidating, I can see through him. His unsettled state of mind is more than obvious to me, and instead of coming across as angry, he just looks saddened to me. Jimin has been my friend for too long that his fake anger doesn't affect me anymore.

     I walk up to him and carefully sit down beside him, my movements slow. I don't take my gaze off of him as my bottom touches the cold, hard ground, my attention focused on him and only him. Even though Jimin told me to go away, he himself doesn't move. Instead, he curls into himself even more upon my arrival, trying to block me out as much as possible.

     I can't lie and say that I don't feel horrible for being the cause of this, but at this point, I've somewhat forgiven myself. It's become a known fact to me that I can't deny how I feel anymore, and if I'm honest, Jimin and Taehyung never really seemed happy together. I want to make both of them happy, and although it doesn't seem like it, I believe I made the right decision. It was meant to happen eventually, I just wish it could have happened differently. I wish I could've told them, both of them how I feel instead of getting caught up in this horrible cycle of drama and heartache.

     I never wanted to hurt anyone.

     I bite my bottom lip briefly and take a deep breath before I turn to face Jimin, my chest aching and fluttering simultaneously from the conflicts within me.

     "Hyung, I... I'm sorry." I whisper tentatively, finding it actually painful to speak over the rock in my throat. The desire to have Taehyung near me ignites in my chest, but I ignore it. I couldn't have brought Taehyung. He wouldn't be able to take this, and besides... I don't think the conversation would last long if it was all three of us.

     "Sorry's not going to fix things." Jimin mumbles, his gaze trained in the distance, resisting to even spare me a glance. The guilt within me only becomes more defined, but I attempt to form words in my mind. I'm not going to give up on this. I can't lose my best friend, not like this.

     "I know, hyung... I know that a simple apology won't miraculously make everything better, but I just want you to know the truth. Please listen?"

     I can see Jimin bite his bottom lip, his muddled eyes still intent on looking forward. "Didn't you already explain everything?" He whispers softly in reply, the anger in his voice finally gone.