44~ Insecurities

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I feel a warm body pressed against mine as I wake up. I snuggle closer and breath in his scent. I missed this. I missed waking up to somebody every morning. I missed feeling the warmth radiating off of someone else. Feeling safe in someone's arms. I sigh as I feel Percy stroking my hair.

"Morning, Love," he whispers. "How'd you sleep?"

"Like a baby," I smile and snuggle closer.

"Are you ready for the ball this weekend?" Percy whispers before he kisses my forehead.

"Yeah, it'll be great. New dress, new shoes. Fancy makeup and hair. Spending time with friends and old school peers that I haven't seen in forever. Show you and your sexiness off. Show how good I've got it now," I reply with a wink.

He chuckles, "Is that all I'm going for? Hmm, I dont know if I want to go anymore."

I push him over, sit on his hips, and pin his arms, "You're going rather you like it or not, mister."

"Or what? What will you do to me?"

I smirk, "I'll move back to my flat and not talk to you for a whole month."

I looks up at me an pouts, "But, babe, you love me." He flashes his winning smile at me, "Y'know, you look hot like that."

I look down at myself and am suddenly very aware that I am naked. I look away and blush heavily, "Don't say that." I get off of his hips and cover up with a blanket.

He sits up and looks over at me, "What's wrong?"

I shake my head.

"Hermione," he asks as he reaches over to touch my arm, "what did I do? Talk to me."

I look down at the sheets and fight back the urge to cry, "You just don't understand." I sniffle, "I'm not beautiful like this. I'm ugly. I have scars and stretch marks. My body is ruined.." I cry.

He leans in and hugs me close, "You, Hermione Granger, are many things, but ugly is not one of them. How could you even think that about yourself? And scars? Your scars prove that you've lived. Your scars prove that my girl is brave. And the stretch marks? You had a beautiful baby girl. Your body is not ruined, it's a sanctuary. It was a growing place for a baby. And that, is beautiful."

I look up at him and stare into his beautiful green eyes, "Thank you," I whisper.

"Don't you ever even think that you are less than perfect. You'd just be lying to yourself," he states. He leans in and kisses me passionately as he runs his hands over my stomach.

*+*+*

If I wouldn't have married the Weasel I wouldn't have these insecurities. I wouldn't feel this ugly.

I know it's not entirely his fault, but if you get told over and over again a certain thing, you're going to start believing it. It gets pounded into your head until you have no choice but to believe it. Then, when someone comes around that tells you something different, you can't help but deny it. You can't help but feel like they're lying to you.

I hate Ronald for that. I hate that he convinced me that I wasn't pretty. I hate that he convinced me I was damaged goods. I hate that he took my daughter and abducted Percy. I hate that he took my confidence away.

But I am going to work to get those things back. I will no longer stand by and let his voice whisper in my ear.

I am done. I will be free.

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