Love In The Dark

Chaper 9

All my things are packed, I'm ready to leave everything behind.

"Ms. Adkins, I'll meet you tomorrow at my office yeah?" Lance, my new manager/producer phoned me.

"Noted, at what time?" I responded dryly as I loaded my luggage on my black cayenne SUV car.

"Anytime you please to, I'll see you around in London Adele." I hung up the phone, closing the back door of my car.

I went back inside my house, checking if I missed some important things of mine.

"Well, wish me all luck Alex... Guide mummy my baby boy..." I kissed Alex's picture and Ian's last ultrasound photo.

"Oh God..." I can't help myself from mourning over my lost loved ones.

"I won't cry, I won't regret this decision of mine..." I held back my tears, wiping my wet cheeks.

I grab Alex's favorite story book for our son and placed it on my bag, including their pictures.

I locked Ian's nursery room and was about to go downstairs when I saw Alex and I's room's door slightly opened.

"I missed you..." I smoothed down Alex's side on our bed, hugging his pillow that was still imbued with his fragrance.

"Please be proud of me Alex, I'm trying to be strong..." I faintly smiled as I arranged our pillows again.

I took my time taking glances on my house. On every corner of this place, I remember Alex and I's most treasured moments.

Him cooking in our kitchen, us watching and cuddling on the couch, me running around the house as our giggles gives life to this place.

I missed my life, before Tristan took away the happiness from me. I missed my laughs. I missed being happy. I missed Alex. I missed my friends. I missed my mum. I missed my old self. I feel like my life is flashing by and there's nothing I can do but to cry, watching myself turn into a cold hearted and dead human inside.

I never had warm and happiness again instead, I am trapped inside my fears and nightmares. Yes, I had felicity but that was million years ago.

"I love you..." I took a big white cloth and covered Alex and I's wedding picture that was hanging on the wall.

I placed a signage on my front lawn and finally locked the doors, ready for my new life.

Heading down the streets made me terribly sick. I know this is hard but I need to help my own self, because no one in this world can.

As I held the steering wheel, I saw my white diamond wedding ring.

"Don't cry Adele. You're done." I suppressed my tears and swerved my car to a different direction.

Before the sun went down, I made it to Alex and Ian's grave.

"I'm leaving but I will never forget the both you... I'll leave you my heart..." I took my green small notebook from my bag and buried it at the top of Alex's grave.

There lies my man and I's memories, my written old happy life, the songs I composed for Ian, and most of all my heart.

I died with my boys and the old Adele won't come back anymore. Life was taken away from me, happiness was demounted from me.

A/N: trying to put myself back together and considering writing as my remedy. Sorry for this, but only coldness is what I can feel rn.

- A.

P.s thanks for the comforting words, it helped me somehow x