Divergent: The Unknown Girl

Chapter 19: Conflicted

Tobias POV

"Eli! Eli, no stay awake, no." I shout as I watch her eyes shut, I turn around and punch the wall out of anger. I look at Eli, Nurses are pushing me out. "No, Eli needs me." I mutter. I felt my heart was being stamped on it hurt so much. I hated see Eli like this but she needs me more than she has ever needed me before.

"We will do everything we can but you will get in the way. Wait in the waiting room and don't do anything stupid." The nurse says, obviously she has heard of my reputation, I walk to the waiting room I sit there. My head in my hands.

This is all that bitch's fault, why did she have to get jealous huh? Why would she shoot someone she had a crush on anyways? That is just fucked up. Now I could lose Eli. I watch as Tris walks in and sits next to me.

"She will be ok." Tris says stroking my cheek, this isn't the time to be stroking my cheek. I look at her fingers and they are wet. Am I crying? Of course I am I could lose my sister.

"It should have been me, I should be laying there." I state leaning my head back, "Where is Amy?" Anger filling me, I had to get revenge.

Tris shakes my head, "I am not going to tell you that Tobias, you know that Eli needs you here. By her side when she wakes up, you also know she would hate you getting involved with her battles."

"This isn't her battle, it was mine, she was just stood at the wrong place at the wrong time, that bullet was aimed for me!" I yell at her, my head moving back in my hands.

Suddenly the whole gang walks into the waiting room, "We all heard what happened, I am so sorry Four. But she will be able to fight through it, I mean she is the strongest person I know." Marlene spoke softly.

I look up at her and just nod, my mind was working hard though, She was scared, she has been through so much pain yet she was afraid of a gunshot wound? She has been stabbed multiple times but she was terrified. She has been in darkness yet she was terrified to let the darkness win.

"She has never been shot before." I conclude out loud, I look up to see that everyone was confused by my statement, so I told them all my though process. "That is why she was afraid, she has felt all these different pains but she has never felt being shot. It didn't register at first, the shock in her eyes when she looked down at saw the blood. I saw the pain in her eyes, she made her body immune to all of the pains she had felt before. she never felt the pain of being shot so it was new. So it hurt." I felt tears streaming down my face, everyone was silent so I carried on. "I was in shock too, she would have been able to stay awake longer if I just snapped out of my daze, if I was fast enough I would have been able to disarm Amy instead of her having to do it. If she didn't push her body she would have been able to stay awake longer."

I stand up and start pacing back and forth, my mind was analysing everything that happened, "She looked back at me, she was staring at me so expectantly, I let her down, she expected me to wake up and disarm Amy. The truth is I was stunned, seeing the pain in her eyes, I couldn't move, I was scared, I have never been so scared, the only other time I have been afraid like this is when I heard her scream the morning after she saved me. I should have acted but I was frozen, I shouldn't have been, we have been trained to act in those situation." I was yelling, not at any one in the room, I was yelling at myself, I was so frustrated. "She has saved me twice now and I have never saved her. It is my job to save her!" I yell more punching the wall, my fist goes through the wall, and tears just kept streaming down face.

I hear movement, "Tobias..." I faintly hear a voice, I know it is Tris but I don't acknowledge it, I am to mad at myself I should have acted I have failed. I am a failure. "Tobias!" Tris shouts to get through me.