Chapter 19
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When I woke up, I noticed that it was still light out. I glanced over at my clock. It was 6 pm.
I grunted and stumbled downstairs, plopping on the couch and pulling out my phone.
After about 10 minutes of checking Instagram, my mom came through the door, carrying a bunch of bags.
She placed the bags on the counter and looked over at me.
"You look like you just woke up," she said and started to take the things out of the bags.
"Because I did." I told her and sat up, scanning over the things that she got at the store to see if there was anything unhealthy that I could stuff my face with.
"But now you're not gonna be able to sleep tonight," she said.
"Mom... Have you met me?" I said and she chuckled.
"Well, I'm happy that you can sleep again." She said and the mood of the room changed instantly.
I had gone through stage after everything happened where I couldn't close my eyes for more than 10 seconds without getting overwhelmed by anxiety.
On average, the most sleep that I got per week was about 7 or 8 hours. Some nights I got as little sleep as 30 minutes.
A couple times I would just not sleep and stay awake for 48 hours straight.
It was a bad time for me.
Now, however, I'm back to my sleeping machine self. I just hoped that it would stay that way.
"Yeah. Me too." I mumbled and walked back upstairs to my room. I flopped down on my bed and grunted. I hated Sunday nights.
My mother made a quick dinner, which I gladly ate. She still didn't know about the events that happened at the party, and I'd had liked it to stay that way.
After dinner, I ran up to my room and switched on my TV. I scrolled through channels and stopped on Disney Channel. They had been doing a throwback session where they would play all of their old shows. 'That's So Raven' was on, and a sudden surge of happiness consumed me like a huge, rolling wave.
I took a pill, fell asleep to the old Disney Channel, and quickly became engulfed in yet another bizarre dream of mine...
I was kissing someone. I couldn't tell who at the time, but I was kissing them.
We were in a dark room, but I could still see things around the room.
When we both pulled away, I saw who I was kissing...
Eli's face appeared in front of mine.
Not being able to control what I was doing (considering that I was in a dream), I went back in for more.
A sudden surge of warm electricity flooded over me, almost making me immobile.
I pulled away, and looked Eli in his eyes.
Only they weren't brown,
They were blue.
And they weren't Eli's,
They were Ashton's.
He leaned in again to kiss me, and I started to hear a familiar jingle ringing through my head.
I sat up with a jolt in my bed, launching myself forward so fast that I almost fell out of my bed. I caught my breath and gathered myself after that weird ass dream that I had.
I shut off my alarm clock, which thankfully brought me out of my unconsciousness. I put my emphasis on trying to forget the dream as I started to get ready for school.
I had on a pair of black shorts and a cropped tan hoodie paired with my white high-tops. I brushed my hair out and pulled it back into a high ponytail.
On my way to school, I hesitantly decided to listen to some music. I reached for the AUX chord and put on my 'Twenty One Pilots' playlist.
Usually I just liked to have a silent, safe car where I could think. But thinking was the last thing that I wanted to do then. I just wanted to live life in the present and not think about anything other than what was happening at that very moment.
When I pulled into the school, I parked in my usual spot next to Scarlett and Savanah's cars. When I got out, so did they.
"I loveee your outfit!" Scarlett said as she got her bag out of the trunk. I thanked her and the three of us started walking to the school doors.
It was like that for the next couple of weeks. School was somewhat bearable. Scarlett, Savanah, and I were basically sisters, and the boys were basically like my brothers... Except Ashton of course.
Ashton was starting to be a little bit more welcoming to me, but was still super Ashton- like. He was actually starting to grow on me. Not enough to change his contact name, but he still grew on me a little.
Once in a while in the couple of weeks, I noticed Ashton's eyes soften for a few seconds. He had made reference to him being able to hide his emotions before, but I hadn't expected the emotions that he was hiding to be as sad as they looked.
I found myself wondering if Ashton actually was a cold, heartless person. Maybe he was just putting up a front, hiding the real him from everyone. I put the thoughts in the back of my head most of the time, but once in a while they just became so overwhelming that they took up my entire brain.
It was Monday, October 10th. I reached over and slammed my hand down on my phone in a poor attempt to turn off the blood curling alarm.
I grunted and sat up. I didn't feel like dressing up for school, so I just threw on some leggings and a loose crop top. I grabbed a hoodie and jotted downstairs to the kitchen.
When I discovered that we were out of Froot Loops, I decided to skip breakfast and to just go to school. In the car, I didn't listen to music. Listening to music in the car was a one time thing that I did, but I liked it better silent.
When I pulled up to the school, I sighed and got out. The school was decorated for Halloween, with fake spider webs all over the front bushes and doors.
When I got to my locker, I shoved my backpack in it and grabbed my books. When I slammed it shut I noticed that 'it' girl that Scarlett told me used to have a thing with Ashton walk by. She glared me up and down with a snarl as she passed.
I went into the classroom and sat in the back, confused as to why that just happened. She couldn't think that I actually had feelings for Ashton, right?
I mean, yeah, he had an amazing smile, and he seemed like a really observant person- not just a cliché jock- and he had amazing hair, muscles, smelt really good, and his eyes- HIS EYES were...
Wait.
Hold the fuck up.
Did I-
Could I-
...Oh shit
I had a crush on Ashton Monroe.
YOU ARE READING
Hopelessly Devoted
Teen Fiction"Never call a girl a bitch," I glared into his eyes as he opened them, piercing into me, the bright blue drink I had just poured over him still dripping from his dark hair. "Or she just might act like one." I gave him one last sarcastic smile before...
